HUMOR FOR MONDAY MORNING

Posted by Unknown On Monday, April 26, 2010 8 comments
The following jokes were sent to me by various people and it is my pleasure to share them with you this morning. Funny as they may sound, there is wisdom in some of the statements :-) so smile, be happy and have a great day!

Three Easy Ways to Die...

1. Take a Cigar daily - You will die 10 years early.
2. Drink Rum daily - You will die 30 years early.
3. Love Someone Truly - You will die daily.

A. A foolish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.

B. Three FASTEST means of Communication:
1. Tele-Phone
2. Tele-Vision
3. Tell a Woman
If you Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE.

C. Love your friends not their sisters. Love your sisters not their friends.

D. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend - You are missing SOME thing in your life. If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.

E. Question: When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE?
Answer: On their MARRIAGE.

F. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY TO GOD and asks him to free you from Darkness. Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.

8 comments to HUMOR FOR MONDAY MORNING

  1. says:

    Justice Humor for Monday morning?

    Sorry, we are mourning - for the loss of PR in Hulu Selangor1

  1. says:

    Anonymous A person who, no matter how desperate the situation, gives others hope, is a true leader.

    ~~ Daisaku Ikeda

  1. says:

    Unknown Dear Justice

    Sighs. I know....We have to move on and not let this hold us back from finishing the journey to Putrajaya.

    I am just trying to bring back some cheer into cybersphere....

    My apologies if this post implies the lack of sensitivity to the current dismal gloom. Sighs..

    If you have time, do read my other post called VICTORY BELLS TOLL WHILE TEARS ROLL at :

    http://masterwordsmith-unplugged.blogspot.com/2010/04/victory-bells-toll-while-tears-roll.html

    Thanks, Justice, for being honest and sincere...

    Take care and God bless.

  1. says:

    Ting On aid to rebuild the Rasa school, Najib said :

    "If we win this by-election, you can come to Kuala Lumpur the next day to look for me. I will write a personal letter to approve the money and it will be transferred to the school board’s account. If we lose, don’t have to come."

  1. says:

    ahoo If anyone needs to be free of court charges, join bn. If anyone needs to be a free loader, join bn. If anyone needs supports after being caught with the pant down, join bn and for the rest of us who detest such corruptions, we live to stand our grounds.

    We stand on righteousness and demand change to come first onto ourself and to effect change in society and the nation.

    Fear not for we have just this one life to live and what we do with it counts for the future generation as this legacy will be remembered for ages !!!

  1. says:

    Unknown Dear Anon @ 11.10am

    Thanks for sharing the inspirational wisdom of Daisaku Ikeda.

    I marvel at the way you can find such gems from Daisaku Ikeda to match the post.

    I am blessed to have you as a reader to share such wisdom, especially during these trying moments.

    Take care and please keep in touch.

  1. says:

    Unknown Dear Ting

    I believe those to whom these were directed did not cower in fear but walked with wisdom.

    At least I hope they did....

    Take care and God bless you.

  1. says:

    Unknown Dear ahoo

    Thanks for sharing street wisdom from the university of experience and reality.

    Indeed we have to join hands and stand firm on righteousness, integrity and seek to uphold moral values at all times for the sole purpose of bringing on healing for this land.

    Yes, we must not cower in fear but stand up for what we believe in together in a united voice.

    Take care and God bless you always.

    Shalom

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