Here are some fantastic facts which might keep you entertained on a Saturday morning.
Some of it may sound bizarre but these are apparently true facts! Try it and let me know :-). Here's a joke to start you off! Have a nice day!
The Three Priests
Three priests were in a train station on their way home to Pittsburgh . Behind the ticket counter was A Very Very Shapely, Well Endowed Girl wearing a Very Tight Sweater. The girl made the three priests very nervous, so they drew straws to determine who would purchase the tickets.
The first priest approached the window.'Young lady, I would like three pickets to Titsburg.'
He completely lost his composure and fled!
The second priest goes to the window.
'Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh and I would like the change in nipples and dimes.'
Mortified, he too fled!
The third priest moves to the window.
'Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh and I would like the change in nickels and dimes. And, I must say, if you insist on dressing like that, when you get to the pearly gates St. Finger is going to shake his Peter at you.'
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The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for blood plasma.
No piece of paper can be folded in half more than seven (7) times. Oh go ahead...I'll wait...
Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes or shark attacks. (So, watch your Ass )
You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.
Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty (50) years of age or older.
The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.
The King of Hearts is the only king WITHOUT A MOUSTACHE
American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one (1) olive from each salad served in first-class.
Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise. (Since Venus is normally associated with women, what does this tell you!) (That women are going the 'right' direction...?)
Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.
Most dust particles in your house are made from DEAD SKIN!
The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer. So did the first 'Marlboro Man'.
Walt Disney was afraid OF MICE!
PEARLS MELT IN VINEGAR!
The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca Cola,and Budweiser, in that order.
It is possible to lead a cow upstairs... but, not downstairs.
A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.
Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least six (6) feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.
(I keep my toothbrush in the living room now!)
And the best for last....
Turtles can breathe through their butts. (I know some people like that, don't YOU?)
So.......................
Remember, knowledge is everything, so pass it on...and go move your toothbrush!!! Have a nice day!!
22 comments to SATURDAY MORNING HUMOR
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A Single Vote Ma'am,
Should we not have a by-election every other weekend so a fraction of our money goes back to the rakyat rather than all into their pockets?
Let us remind the folks in Hulu Selangor to thank the by-election and not the politicians for their recent windfall.
They not only steal everything from us but they instil their evil ways in our children. It is alright to lie, to manipulate the old and ignorant, to pretend to be noble, give away scraps and then demand that the people be grateful after.
We now have the grateful dead in Hulu Selangor as they have a new road promised for the Chinese cemetery.
Mr PM, thank you very much for the gesture but we look after our own when they are alive and not after they have passed on, and certainly not only because of a by-election. And we have many more promises which we always keep. Promises, promises, and more promises.
Was with friends who had come in to HS all the way from Penang and it is so very sad to hear the PKR turncoats give their reasons without even flinching,and with heads held high, it is definitely never about money, it is about principles!!!
Let us hope when they speak to their children they can look them in the eyes and not have to turn away because of the contempt in those eyes. You give them education in Australia and you go for their convocation but you fail to understand that they are now able to think for themselves and that they cannot accept that for money one can change one's principles overnight.
Have you now forsaken all that you have sacrificed for... your children, all for a few Ringgit?
Remember that 18 year old girl who wrote in to the Dear Thelma column because she was contemplating suicide as she was so ashamed of her businessman father who was feeding the parasites for the 'contacts'. She was aware that her father was doing this so she can have a better life but she didn't want it that way. Bless her, pray she's alright now.
Our children today have a greater sense of dignity and integrity than a lot of our statesmen, that's for sure.
Lets vote with our heads in HS, for our children. Lets get rid of those parasites.
And to all of you still working so very hard for the cause in HS, thank you and God Bless.
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Huilu Dear A Single Vote,
Have you now forsaken all that you have sacrificed for... your children, all for a few Ringgit?
I dread to think of that!!
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Anonymous I wonder how the priests would have reacted if our Fat Mama were to be behind the ticket counter?
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Selvi No one can ever deny that BN is still strong in the rural areas simply because they can throw money (rakyat's money, actually) during the elections and fish for votes.
Hulu Selangor voters need to vote wisely. Please think of your future, the future of your next generation!
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Justice RM50,000 for each Felda settler, and more $$$$ to come, provided BN wins. Isn't this blatant corruption? What have the Election Commission and MACC to say about this?
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Very Sad Let's have the courage to vote out an unjust regime.
We are appealing for justice. We can no longer hide in the shadows of arrogant, false leaders.
God bless
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Pro-Zaid The talk in the coffeshops these days is: Indian votes are cheap and easy. Just throw them some crumbs and no matter how you treat them, they will keep quiet.
The actions by some within UMNO recently and MIC's inability to stand up to them shows that this is not merely talk.
~~ By Vijay Kumar Murugavell (Malaysia Today)
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HS Voter To all my dear fellow HS voters :
Please prove to the rotten BN that we are not blinder than those who are physically blind.
Let's vote with conscience!
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Raymond Perak frogs freed?
Aiya, if my primary one son defended them in court also win lah!
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Selvi “And what is wrong with Kamalanathan hugging me, maybe he hugged me because he wanted me to fight for the Indians,” Ibrahim added.
Kkakakakakakakakakaka!
Yet another joke of the century!
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Unknown Dear Anon @ 7.45am
Thanks so much for sharing that information - amazing!!!
But we have to agree that it was with lots of help! LOL!!!
Cheers and thanks for the smiles!
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Unknown Dear A Single Vote
Many thanks for your wonderful comment which I reposted as part of a post featuring comments from readers on the HS by-election.
Take care and know that I appreciate that you wrote from a heart that cares for and loves Malaysian.
God bless you and yours!
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Huilu
I also dread to think of it. Thanks for being of the same mind and heart for this country.
God bless you!
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Selvi
Excellent exhortation to HS voters. Thank you and bless your kind heart. Take care and have a lovely weekend.
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Justice
I have yet to see any comment from them. :-(
Thanks for highlighting this angle. Take care and have a lovely weekend.
God bless you and yours!
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Unknown Dear Very Sad
Indeed!!! We have to break out of the chains of bondage that have been holding us back from progressing!
HS voters - please vote wisely!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Pro-Zaid
Thanks for sharing clips from Vijay's brilliant letter.
Let's hope that HS voters will rise to the occasion and not disappoint us!
Salam
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Unknown Dear HS Voter
Yes!!! I pray every single voter will vote wisely with a conscience and a heart for our country!
God bless you as you and yours go out to cast your vote tomorrow!
Take care!
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Raymond
LOL!!! Thanks for sharing with much wit and comical realism.
Take care and do keep in touch.,
God bless you and your family!
Best wishes
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Unknown Dear Selvi
There is an article which says that they share a love for the Constitution.
Well, news always amazes us :-).
Cheers
Anonymous Hmm... "I would like the change in pickles/tickles and dames"
From the wiki on Paper folding
"A popular belief holds that it is impossible to fold a sheet of paper in half more than 7 times, folding in any direction, as the challenge had existed for many years and had never been solved. This belief was debunked by then high school student Britney Gallivan who successfully folded a piece of paper 12 times."
"The television series MythBusters "busted the myth" of the 7 fold limit by folding taped-together sheets in half and turning 90 degrees each time, for a total of 11 folds. The first eight folds were completed by hand, while the rest were completed using both steam rollers and fork lifts."
:-)