masterwordsmith-unplugged

I spent the whole afternoon reading my old posts of 2008/2009 which are archived in another site. Here's my all-time favorite and craziest post which I am reposting in a moment of madness. I thought we all need a bit of laughter to jumpstart the weekend. Take care, laugh a lot, live life to the fullest and do swing by later for the next post! Thanks! Cheers!

Dig. Pick. Roll and flick.

Dig. Pick. Roll and flick.

What am I talking about?

The National Past Time of Malaysian Drivers of course!!!

Buddy - get rid of your booger!!!!

Whenever I stop at any traffic light, I look to my left and to my right. What do I see? More often than not, my eyes will fall upon a driver(could be male or could be female) happily, contentedly digging his/her nose, picking from various angles and if the wait was longer, would be proudly rolling his/her own nugget after which would be the long awaited ritual of flicking it to the heavens!

Gosh! At this juncture, you might either be bellowing/howling with laughter or blushing as though you have been caught on candid camera (just kidding….I am not at all implying that you partake in this ecstatic practice). Good heavens, NO!!!!!

So what compels drivers or even people to dig their noses?

10 reasons why people pick their noses (written by yours truly)

1. In their previous life, they were gold diggers either in the Californian Gold Rush or in Australia.

2. They are mulling over the blue print of an electronic nose digging device so that they can become rich and famous.

3. Out of sheer dissatisfaction with the shape of their nose, size of their nostrils, they do the 'Dig, Pick, Roll and Flick' routine in an attempt to challenge nature and to make themselves more beautiful as they contort their faces oops I mean their noses to their own whims and fancies instead of going under the knife.

4. Deep in their hearts, they want to leave a mark behind by flicking their harvested booger so that when these do land on target, it can harden and become an artistic work of art sticking to the walls of the car window or anywhere they please.

5. It is the easiest and fastest way to ensure that time passes meaningfully and dare I add - fruitfully.

6. The wicked streak in them propels them to leave the fruit of their labour behind in such a way that maybe, just maybe, it might land on their enemies’ faces, food, drink, hair or whatever pleases their aim.

7. Nose picking is a highly addictive habit. Watch someone pick his/her nose and the innocent observer will soon indulge as well (happily and unknowingly).

8. The scientist in them moves them to collect these specimens for further study. Who knows, it could be a cure for cancer, or even to investigate whether there are similarities in the DNA of nose diggers. By Jove, the discovery would reveal a new found breed!!!

9. With the scarcity of resources, these nose diggers intend to use their harvested booger in new and exciting ways e.g. seasoning food (excuse me…I did not say food for their own consumption, could be for enemies).

10. They exist purely because of a "If you can’t stop them, join them" scenario.

Allow me to share an interesting tale about one of my former students. I asked my Sociology students to come up with a new invention that would help mankind.

This young man (Dr. M. T. practising in Liverpool) came up with his Excavator X device (cannot remember the exact name of his invention).

What is this contraption?


* A battery-operated device that aids in nose picking.
* has four brushes - one to dig, another to excavate, another to squirt water and the last to vacuum/suck out the findings
*Optional gadgets include comb to brush nostril hair and a tiny scissors to trim those black thingies sticking out of the two caverns.

Classic isn’t it? He got an 'A' for creativity. Every time I think of him, I always smile at the remembrance of his sketch. My only regret is I wish I had kept the poster. Smile .


So, the next time you see someone digging his/her nose, stop and think. Why are they doing it? Is there some hidden charm, pleasure and delight that can be derived from this very popular activity? Comments are indeed MOST welcome.

Anyway, have fun digging oooops I mean have fun reading :-p. Cheers.


*I wish to reiterate that I do not intend to deride or mock at nose diggers and humbly apologize if I have hurt or offended you in any way. As mentioned, the intention of this post is for humor and not out of malice. And yes, I am a very eccentric and crazy netizen LOL!!

Please leave a comment to share your thoughts or er...;-) experiences *winks*.

Cheers!