DRIVING AWAY THE SHADOWS

Posted by Unknown On Tuesday, March 3, 2009 2 comments

Many who keep abreast with the news would know that today is a sad day for Malaysia. Yet, I choose not to dwell in the shadows of doubt but to drive them away with the hope that justice will prevail....

I thought it is timely then that I post this article written by Steve Goodier to inspire us to believe that whilst some may be cavorting away to convolute and convert or contort myths into truths, truths into lies, those who take it all in good stead, good faith, clear conscience and uphold virtues, the law and the voice of the people as spoken via the ballot box will prevail...

Driving Away the Shadows

by Steve Goodier

When Abraham Lincoln was shot at Ford's Theatre in Washington, D.C. on April 14, 1865, he was carrying two pairs of spectacles and a lens polisher, a pocketknife, a watch fob, a linen handkerchief, and a brown leather wallet containing a five-dollar Confederate note and several newspaper clippings on the Lincoln presidency.

Why did he keep the newspaper clippings? Some of them extol his achievements as president of the United States. In one, Henry Ward Beecher is quoted in a speech as saying, "Abraham Lincoln may be a great deal less testy and wilful (sic) than Andrew Jackson, but in the long race, I do not know that he will be equal to him." The reporter then writes, "The storm of applause that followed this seemed as if it would never cease."

Why would he carry such a clipping? If we know anything about Lincoln, we know that humility was one of his most attractive virtues. I can't imagine that he read from the article during political discussions or entertained dinner guests with its keen insight.

I do not know the answer to these questions. But I am aware that Abraham Lincoln suffered from bouts of serious depression. Could it be that in those "dark nights of the soul," when despair settled over his mind like a cold and heavy snow, that he could reach into his pocket and find hope? Could it be that these words reminded him of what he had dedicated his life to, the good he had tried to do and the lives he had affected?

Francis of Assisi once said, "A single sunbeam is enough to drive away many shadows."

We are all collectors of sunbeams. We may have saved away letters and mementoes that warm our hearts and encourage us when we need a lift.

And we can all be radiators of sunbeams, too. A letter, card or note of sincere appreciation can drive away dark shadows like nothing else.

Will you be giver of the light? Will you be positive, hopeful and prayerful?

Let our hearts not give up hope...when all else fails, God never fails us...and He will make a way!!

__________

Steve Goodier Publisher@LifeSupportSystem.com is a professional speaker, consultant and author of numerous books. Visit his site for more information, or to sign up for his FREE newsletter of Life, Love and Laughter at http://LifeSupportSystem.com.


THE TOP TEN MISTAKES THAT COUPLES OFTEN MAKE

Posted by Unknown On 3 comments

People enter into partnerships with optimism and goodwill. Partnerships often turn sour because ineffective patterns of relating become habitual and lead to a gradual withdrawal of esteem and caring for each other.

1. Avoid conflict. Avoided conflict requires repression of anger, which leads to depression of feelings. A genuinely passionate partnership requires conflict, not terminal niceness or withdrawal.

2. Avoid each other. Occasional withdrawal is healthy. Habitual withdrawal (stonewalling) is death to partnership.

3. Escalate. Conflict, skillfully handled, is one of the keys to a great relationship. Conflict out of control is an excuse for physical, verbal, or psychological abuse. If both partners are angry, then take time out.

4. Criticize. Habitually speaking (or thinking) criticism is hard on a relationship. Criticism is usually a sign of that the criticizing partner has some personal development work to do. It is OK to complain, but not OK to criticize.

5. Show contempt. Contempt is criticism escalated to outright mental abuse.

6. React defensively. Fear is natural. Defensiveness naturally accompanies fear. Skillful partnering requires practicing techniques that allow me to drop the defensiveness despite my fear.

7. Deny responsibility. When we deny our responsibilty for our part of the issue, we wind up blaming our partner and trying to change him or her.

8. Rewrite history. Remembering mainly the negative experiences in a partnership is a predictor for future breakdown. All partnerships have their difficult spots. Partners that stay together are proud of their ability to weather the stormy seas and are warmed by their memories of the happy times spent on tropical beaches.

9. Refuse to get help. Partnership coaching and willingness works!

10. Believe that changing partners is the solution. People may go through several partners while repeatedly avoiding the same basic issues. We naturally choose partners that push our buttons for our personal development. Refusing to learn the requisite lesson requires another repetition.

It takes a lot of time and effort to build a relationship but just a jiffy to destroy it...an unkind word, a thoughtless act, words not said, acts not done...may we give our most to our partners that we may live a life of loving and living in harmony.


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