1. I love you because you love me and you are the father of our boys.
2. I love the way I know you'll never give up on me no matter how irritating I may be.
3. I love the way you tease me when I ask you if I look fat or if I have aged :-).
4. I love the way you look at me whenever I ask you if I look good in an outfit.
5. I love the beauty of your light brown eyes in which I can see your love shining steadily.
6. I love you because you add meaning and purpose each day to my life.
7. I love you because you are the reason why I am still alive and exuberant for life- to be with you!!!.
8. I love the way we watched sunsets together during our courtship years.
9. I love the way we sometimes stay up all night and just talk and then ... and then fall asleep together.
10. I love you because I know you are always dependable and you'll always be there when I need you.
11. I love you because you bring out the best in me by allowing me to be who I am and loving me for who I am too.
12. I love you because we belong to each other.
13. I love how I feel complete when I am with you.
14. I love how our bodies just fit together.
15. I love the way you make me laugh.
16. I love the way you laugh with your head thrown backwards.
17. I love the way you won't compromise yourself and won't let me compromise myself too when we are together.
18. I love the way you take a deep breath, cock your head and stretch your neck before you go into your so-called philosophical discourses.
19. I love your thoughtfulness.
20. I love your tenderness.
21. I love your ability to speak your thoughts through your eyes without saying a single word.
22. I love the way we glance at each other across the room and can read each other's minds.
23. I love the way, how even though when you are not beside me, I can still feel like you're right here with me.
24. I love the way you surprise me with little gestures(such as buying my favorite red bean soup from Jelutong) that show that you love me.
25. I love the way you'll listen to my stories even though you may not be interested in it and you are not hearing what I am saying and think I don't know when in fact I do.
26. I love the way you are patient with me and put up with my seasonal cravings for certain foods, drinks or desserts.
27. I love the way you try to be interested in the things that interest me (such as my blogging) even though you hate to read.
28. I love the way you let me do what I want to do without imposing conditions even though you may not approve of it but because I am sensitive to your tots, I stop doing it (such as cutting down my blogging time).
29. I love how you win my respect without being an intimidating or arrogant person.
30. I love you because I would do anything in this world to make you happy.
31. I love how you would make sacrifices to make me happy such as giving up your evening jog to be with me when I feel blue.
32. I love the way your voice sounds over the phone and how it has not changed in over thirty years.
33. I love the way your voice sounds when you whisper sweet nothings in my ear although that is quite rare!!!! (*hint*)
34. I love the completeness and oneness I feel when we are together.
35. I love your sensuality and the way you love me.
36. I love how you can forgive me when I fumble and fall.
37. I love how you are my soul mate.
38. I love the way you handle troubled times.
39. I love the way you respect me and my ideals/beliefs even though we may differ in opinion.
40. I love the way you protect and defend me objectively in the face of challenges.
41. I love how you feel when we cuddle.
42. I love the way you used to sing to me in our younger days (*hint*).
43. I love the softness of you lips against my hair and cheek.
44. I love the feeling of being together and not having to make conversation but the silence is comforting and peaceful.
45. I love you because heaven is falling asleep in bed beside you at night talking about the boys.
46. I love waking up to find you have already prepared breakfast and the aroma of coffee fills the kitchen.
47. I love the surprises you leave for me even though it is rare.
48. I love your wisdom and humility.
49. I love your ingenuity in repairing stuff around the house.
50. I love your ability to be a responsible citizen and father and husband and human being.
51. I love your love for life and most of all for God and how you begin each day with Him.
52. I love your passion for your hobbies and interests.
53. I love how every time I look at you, you still take my breath away even with your white hair ;).
54. I love how I thank God everyday for bringing someone as wonderful as you into my life.
55. I love the fact you gave me the gift of love and that we can share our lives together.
56. I love the special moments that we shared that will remain my fondest memories of you and I .
57. I love you because spending my life with YOU is the best time of my life.
58. I love how my heart skips a beat whenever you walk into the room.
59. I love how you love me in your quiet unassuming way.
60. I love you because I know you will keep to your marriage vows and that you will never leave me or forsake me.
61. I love the ways you choose to show your affection and love for me in your own quiet way.
62. I love the way you inspire me to be more than I am and to change to be a better person, never condemning or criticizing me.
63. I love the way you encourage my creativity and imagination.
64. I love the way you make me feel like anything is possible as long as I'm with you.
65. I love your sense of humor because when you laugh, you really laugh.
66. I love the way you iron the shirts when you know I am too tired to do so.
67. I love the way you take care of my pets.
68. I love your understated gentlemanly ways.
69. I love you just the way you are, a wonderful honest, caring, thoughtful, loving, sincere etc...
70. I love your spontaneity.
71. I love our decades spent together.
72. I love how if I died right now I would be the happiest person alive knowing I shared my life with you.
73. I love you because I know that we as we grow old together, we will take care of each other.
74. I love your way with words or the lack of it in moments of silence.
75. I love the way you look when you are sleeping.
76. I love the way you make your coffee and your gourmet breakfast in the morning.
77. I love your willingness to share your life and most especially your heart with me.
78. I love your strength of character.
79. I love you because you are the most patient man who can tolerate my idiosyncrasies.
80. I love the way you eat what I cook with little complaints :-).
81. I love the way you treat me.
82. I love the way you take care of me esp when walking along the streets or crossing the road.
83. I love you even though we share differences in interests and pursuits.
84. I love the way you take the time to thank me for doing every day things.
85. I love the way you show your affection when we are together.
86. I love the way you show your affection in unexpected ways.
87. I love your quiet confidence.
88. I love your ability to make me feel better when times are tough.
89. I love the way we seldom ever fight or argue but move in synch together.
90. I love how you give me words of wisdom when i am clueless.
91. I love the way you support me and steer me back when I'm off track.
92. I love the way you take the time to show me how much you love me.
93. I love your beautiful hair even tho it is much whiter than what it used to be.
94. I love your brains.
95. I love you because I know you are faithful and true.
96. I love your ability to talk things through.
97. I love your courage to be you, to stand up for what you believe in without batting an eyelid..
98. I love your greatness.
99. I love the fact that you want to be with me and love me.
100. I love how I am and feel when I am with you!
101. I love you for who you are.
The greatest gift we can give one another in a relationship is our true selves — being who we are. For some this is not difficult, but for most it takes practice to take off the masks and become real. At first it can seem frightening to stop playing games, and just be. However, much of the trouble that arises in relationships is because we are unwilling to do this. We think the games we play protect us, though they are actually the cause of the problems we have. Our need for real contact is so strong that when it is not there, our partner can easily feel lonely, rejected, or as though they don’t matter much.
There are all kinds of ways we keep the games going. Instead of finding out who our partner truly is, or what they really need from us, when something happens we don’t like, we rush to label them. They become an object to us, a stranger, or opponent in some way. Before we give them a chance to reveal themselves, we throw them away. In this way, we constantly separate ourselves from one another and then wonder why we feel so alone.
The biggest need we all have is to stop playing games, trust who we are, and realize that each person who comes into our lives is there for a reason; they are worth knowing truly. We must learn to build bridges between ourselves and them; allow open communication to take place. When we are unwilling to do this, it is usually because we are hiding, afraid of being known.
How to Let Go of the Games We Play
To start on our journey of becoming real, it is useful to look closely at the roles we play — the fantasies we so cherish. These roles are often exactly what get in our way. Roles can be hypnotic; it is easy to fall in love with a role or fantasy and begin to believe it is who we truly are.
Or, more commonly, we fall in love with the role someone else is playing, become mesmerized by it, and have no idea at all who the real person is. When that happens, we are not falling in love with the person but with the fantasy they are creating for us. It can and does come as quite a shock when things change, and one day, we find out who they truly are. At this point, many relationships get rocky.
There are many reasons it may feel dangerous to let go of a role or image. For some, the idea of being true has become confused with the idea of being selfish, not caring about the feelings of others. Oddly enough, just the opposite is so. When we are able to respond truthfully, real caring can begin to arise. On the other hand, when we act from our roles and games, we are implicitly demanding this kind of false response from others. This way of relating is deadening, and takes the enthusiasm, fun, and aliveness away. Everything becomes predictable. Boredom sets in.
The biggest danger of being lost in a role is that we lose touch with the reality of who we really are and what’s going on, both for ourselves and others. An incredible amount of misunderstanding comes about when we are glued to a particular fantasy or role. Unglue yourself a little.
In order to unglue ourselves from the usual roles we play, it is helpful to step into another’s shoes. Try seeing the situation from your partner’s point of view. Pretend you are them for a few moments. What would you need or want if that were true? Look at yourself through their eyes. You may be in for quite a surprise. As our compassion for and understanding of others increases, our stereotyped reactions melt away.
We constantly need to broaden our horizons. No relationship can stay the same forever. If it does grow, it begins to fade. If we do not expand, we begin to atrophy as well. As we become real and respond from the truth of who we are, a sense of fresh possibilities, flexibility, and aliveness comes to us. It brings excitement and adventure as well. This is a surefire way to bring the greatest gift, both to others and to ourselves.
by Dr. Brenda Shoshanna
About the Author:
Discover the surprising truths about love that will save your relationship, in Dr. Shoshanna’s top e-book “Save Your Relationship (21 Basic Laws of Successful Relationships)” — http://www.truthaboutlove.com. Psychologist, relationship expert, speaker, and noted author has helped thousands become stable, strong, and fulfilled. Get free ezine and reports at http://www.brendashoshanna.com. Contact at: topspeaker@yahoo.com
Seldom in life do I find people with whom I can connect and hold a lively conversation for hours on end. Don't you feel that when you make a connection with someone, it is so exciting because it signifies the start of a beautiful journey called friendship? Needless to say, sometimes the journey may be wrought with bumps or stops along the way but yet, we cannot deny that these people enrich our lives in more ways than one.
To build long lasting friendships, one needs acceptance, understanding, tolerance,much love, compassion and patience, without which the association would then be regarded as acquaintances or a historical episode in our journey on earth. For me, when I forge a friendship, I would hope that it is for keeps but as I age, the more I realize that it gets tougher as the years go by...Expectations change, past experiences can haunt and then there are other complicated matters...Only time will tell who is real, who is not, who is a friend and who is a true friend.
That is certainly a precious lesson that I learnt recently. It is uncanny how one can weave in and out of different seasons of friendship. While recent encounters have left me wary and cautious of some characters, I am all the more appreciative of those whom I regard as friends...
The worst is saying goodbye to people I love be it because they have departed to the other side, another state or a different country. Indeed, saying goodbye to those I love is very painful. I have lost a number of friends who succumbed to various illnesses in the last few years. Nonetheless, it is amazing how some I have known for decades and others I have known for a few months have major places in my heart.
Last night I had the opportunity to spend a lovely evening with a few friends who are precious to me and it was most invigorating for me as I hardly ever socialize safe for relatives and those former students who return to Penang. One of them is leaving Penang today and I don't know when I will see her again.
Indeed, life is short but it is made more beautiful with people who have dotted our lives with unforgettable moments.
Sometimes, I wonder if I had been a hamster in my previous life for I love solitude like hamsters do...Yet, when in the midst of good company and people I love, then it seems as though that social part of me ,which is largely dormant, is resurrected. Making conversation as though there is no tomorrow most certainly rejuvenates me. In fact, I was so mentally stimulated and happy that I did not sleep till 4 a.m. this morning, pottering around in the kitchen, cleaning the house and of course - blogging!
I guess I felt happy for last night, I communicated without fears or inhibitions and felt safe and secure with them whom I love and trust with my whole heart and soul, knowing that yea...these are very real people in my life and that they don't wear or change masks when communicating with me. I brought my camera with me but did not take a picture - perhaps subconsciously, I feared that looking at the picture might be too painful for I know not when all of us could get together again like last night...
Yet, I thank God for each of them and would like to dedicated the following song, which I actually wanted to sing to them last night, especially to her who is on her way home, but I did not because I feared I might turn emo halfway ;), and I also want to dedicate this song to all my friends, blogger friends and blog readers who have stuck with me through thick and thin, through all the mistakes I made in my life and still call me friend...Thanks to all of you for ...
* being very real, patient people
* teaching me lots about life
* helping me to be wiser
* making me laugh so much especially the one who offered to clean up my Little Green Patch in my Facebook account
* giving me the space to fumble, the grace to forgive me for my tumbles and the silence for me to sort out and learn from the way I stumbled....
So today, I just want to dedicate the following song "FRIENDS" by Michael W. Smith (whose life and music have greatly influenced me) to all my friends who have been with me through thick and thin. It is not that I am feeling emo today but it is because I have lost many loved ones recently and I know the brevity of life and how precious it is and more importantly, how certain people have added so much value to my life because of who they are and what they have done for me, be it directly or indirectly. I have sung this at so many farewells and made many cry, myself included but I have selected this version instead of the recorded version because there is something poignant about seeing Michael W. Smith playing and singing and appreciating his facial expressions and body language that serve to embellish the depth of feeling and meaning of this, my favorite song...and also the next song "I will be here for you" and I will do just that just as you were there for me in the worst period of my life...
Well, the song says it all...but thanks - for being in my life and for all that you have done for me, for leaving an indelible mark in my life and most of all for the gift without ribbons you have given me - friendship. Hugs and love to all of you always...God bless you all always!
Once there was an emperor in the Far East who was growing old and knew it was coming time to choose his successor. Instead of choosing one of his assistants or one of his own children, he decided to do something different.
He called all the young people in the kingdom together one day. He said, "It has come time for me to step down and to choose the next emperor. I have decided to choose one of you." The kids were shocked! But the emperor continued. "I am going to give each one of you a seed today. One seed. It is a very special seed. I want you to go home, plant the seed, water it and come back here one year from today with what you have grown from this one seed. I will then judge the plants that you bring to me, and the one I choose will be the next emperor of the kingdom!"
There was one boy named Ling who was there that day and he, like the others, received a seed. He went home and excitedly told his mother the whole story. She helped him get a pot and some planting soil, and he planted the seed and watered it carefully. Every day he would water it and watch to see if it had grown.
After about three weeks, some of the other youths began to talk about their seeds and the plants that were beginning to grow. Ling kept going home and checking his seed, but nothing ever grew. Three weeks, four weeks, five weeks went by. Still nothing.
By now others were talking about their plants but Ling didn't have a plant, and he felt like a failure. Six months went by, still nothing in Ling's pot. He just knew he had killed his seed. Everyone else had trees and tall plants, but he had nothing. Ling didn't say anything to his friends, however. He just kept waiting for his seed to grow.
A year finally went by and all the youths of the kingdom brought their plants to the emperor for inspection. Ling told his mother that he wasn't going to take an empty pot. But she encouraged him to go, and to take his pot, and to be honest about what happened. Ling felt sick to his stomach, but he knew his mother was right. He took his empty pot to the palace.
When Ling arrived, he was amazed at the variety of plants grown by all the other youths. They were beautiful, in all shapes and sizes. Ling put his empty pot on the floor and many of the other kinds laughed at him. A few felt sorry for him and just said, "Hey nice try."
When the emperor arrived, he surveyed the room and greeted the young people. Ling just tried to hide in the back. "My, what great plants, trees and flowers you have grown," said the emperor. "Today, one of you will be appointed the next emperor!"
All of a sudden, the emperor spotted Ling at the back of the room with his empty pot. He ordered his guards to bring him to the front. Ling was terrified. "The emperor knows I'm a failure! Maybe he will have me killed!"
When Ling got to the front, the Emperor asked his name. "My name is Ling," he replied. All the kids were laughing and making fun of him. The emperor asked everyone to quiet down. He looked at Ling, and then announced to the crowd, "Behold your new emperor! His name is Ling!" Ling couldn't believe it. Ling couldn't even grow his seed. How could he be the new emperor?
Then the emperor said, "One year ago today, I gave everyone here a seed. I told you to take the seed, plant it, water it, and bring it back to me today. But I gave you all boiled seeds which would not grow. All of you, except Ling, have brought me trees and plants and flowers. When you found that the seed would not grown, you substituted another seed for the one I gave you. Ling was the only one with the courage and honesty to bring me a pot with my seed in it. Therefore, he is the one who will be the new emperor!"
-Author Unknown-
