Will Rogers was an amazing person and one of the wisest men of any generation. His accomplishments include being a champion lasso thrower, a performer on the Broadway stage, the star of 71 movies, a radio broadcaster, an author of six books, and a syndicated newspaper columnist. Will Rogers traveled around the world three times and befriended presidents, senators, prime ministers, and kings.
Will Rogers was famous for his simple, insightful humor and his ability to connect honestly with everyone he met. His comments about politics in general and the politics of his generation are among his most memorable. The following are some of the best Will Rogers political quotes.
There’s no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.
Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate; now what’s going to happen to us with both a Senate and a House?
I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.
I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
The more you read and observe about this Politics thing, you got to admit that each party is worse than the other. The one that's out always looks the best.
The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has.
On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.
The man with the best job in the country is the Vice President. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, "How's the President?"
An economist’s guess is liable to be as good as anybody else’s.
Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing -- and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even.
If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?
Be thankful we’re not getting all the government we’re paying for.
Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.
Diplomacy is the art of saying “Nice doggie” until you can find a rock.
A fool and his money are soon elected.
About all I can say for the United States Senate is that it opens with a prayer and closes with an investigation.
Our Constitution protects aliens, drunks, and U.S. Senators.
Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to vote on some man; we never get to vote on what he is to do.
Politics is applesauce.
Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it… You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.
I bet after seeing us, George Washington would sue us for calling him “father.”
There ought to be one day—just one—when there is open season on senators.
The country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.
If I studied all my life, I couldn’t think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of Congress.
If you ever injected truth into politics you’d have no politics.
Things in our country run in spite of government, not by aid of it.
We don’t seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business?
Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
Liberty doesn’t work as well in practice as it does in speeches.
Ohio claims they are due a president as they haven’t had one since Taft. Look at the United States; they have not had one since Lincoln.
The 1928 Republican Convention opened with a prayer. If the Lord can see His way clear to bless the Republican Party the way it’s been carrying on, then the rest of us ought to get it without even asking.
There is no more independence in politics than there is in jail.
All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that’s an alibi for my ignorance.
Will Rogers was asked about the nature of his humorous remarks about politicians. "I have often said in answer to inquiries as to how I got away with kidding some of our public men, that it was because I liked all of them personally, and that if there was no malice in your heart there could be none in your gags, and I have always said I never met a man I didn’t like."
Author's Bio
Garry Gamber is a public school teacher and entrepreneur. He writes articles about politics, real estate, home businesses, poetry, and books. He is the National Director of Good Politics Radio and owns an online BookWise bookstore.
The past few days have been incredibly hectic and enjoyable for me and largely because my dearest friend Angela was up in Penang for a couple of days.
On Thursday, I picked her up for squash and thereafter a swim at golf club. I thought she had membership there and likewise she thought I was a member there when in fact, hubby and I were members at another golf club. Both of us did not know each other's membership status. *choke*
Upon arrival there, I discovered that she had a reciprocal membership which did not allow her to use the squash and pool facilities and thought that I could sort it out with my membership. *gulp* Now the joke is this - I thought it was her sterling acting skills and tried my best to put on an Academy award winning stunt but er...to cut the long story short, in the end, I clocked in as a guest of another friend.
After this and that, we finally ended up at the squash court. I used to play everyday during my varsity days but my interests detoured to bowling and other pursuits. It had been three years since my last game whereas Angela plays every week. I thought the difference in stamina would be considerable but not THAT disgraceful as I am more than ten years her junior and she is undergoing chemotherapy.
I was wrong. VERY WRONG indeed!!!!! *faint*
The Squash Game that Squashed Me.
My forte in my game has always been my service thanks to a girlfriend's coach who used to tag along whenever I played with her after my graduation. He helped me to refine my game and would probably deny ever knowing me had he seen me play that day :-).
Most considerately, Angela assured me that I would not fall splat on my face as I prophesied and promised that she would send the ball to me :-). Well, Angela plays golf, does line dancing, swims and goes gardening whereas yours truly only started her real physical workout on June 22nd!! I think if not for that, I would have collapsed in the court that day.
The sweetheart kept her promise and tried to make it 'easier' for me. Her stamina, grit, strength and aggressiveness is totally AMAZING, AWESOME and MOST INSPIRING.
After forty minutes, I 'surrendered' as I felt that my legs would collapse. Many times, she snickered and politely muffled her laughter hehehe but I still love her very much *grins* !!! She declared that it was not a game but a ball picking session...eh not that bad - I was lazy to get the drop shots :-) even though she kept shouting "LUNGE! LUNGE!" OK. Gimme 6 months to get back into shape...er hopefully not in my dreams.
Thereafter, we went for our swim. She went ahead while I spent some time looking for my goggles. By the time I finally started, she was into her 4th lap and when we stopped, she had done 14 laps while I did a miserable 8 laps in the Olympic-sized pool. Gone. Gone are the days when I could do 20 laps non-stop....Those were the days but I will get back my fitness level.
Then we had dinner with Ted at Roti Bakar and I spent Friday afternoon snooooooozing and trying to recharge for the next day.
On Saturday, Angela, Dr. Murali, Dr. Chee. Teik Lim, Richard Loh, Ching Ling, Calvyn, Lucia and 60 others attended the eLawyer - EXABYTES PENANG BLOGGERS & LAW FORUM 2009 which was held at USM. Sadly, Encik Shamsul was unable to make it and Mr. Foong Cheng Leong and Mr. Steven Tan held the fort. Thereafter it was food again when we lunched with Eddie Law, Foong, Ching Ling, Dr. Murali and Angela.
After a short rest, it was tea at Winter Warmers where Dr. Murali treated Dr. See, Angela and me.
I really had a great time the past few days. Er...too great. Apart from all the fun, laughter and learning, I also had a lot of gifts from friends...including
* 2 boxes of 'chai kuih' from Sungei Bakap compliments from Angela
* a big bottle of home-made kimchi from Alex
* a box of exquisite liqueur chocolates from Eugene (sorry no pics cos I devoured it in 1 day) that had my favorite Cointreau, Drambuie, Vodka, Grand Marnier, Whisky etc etc
* a box of Duc d'O Belgian chocolates from Dr. Murali (Mumu I tell you this is sabotage for my diet but I love it LOL!!!)
* a packet of Famous Amos Chocolate Chip + Pecan cookies from Dr. Murali for Nick
* a box of my favorite Crystal Taro cakes all the way from Taiwan from Jackson whom I taught for 11 years. He is back for summer vacation for three months and is the sweetest, most loving, respectful student with the best mom, dad, granny and sis anyone can have. He visited me last night with his mom and sis last night and we chatted for hours on end.
* Last but not least, a pack of my favorite Hsin Tung Yang beef jerky from Taiwan which Jackson gave me last night. It is so YUUUUMMMILICIOUSSSSSSS!!! For those of you who can eat beef, believe me - this beef jerky is the best in the world!!! And if you love jerky and have never eaten these before, ah - you are missing out in life!!!!
Thank goodness my family and I went hiking yesterday evening. This time round, I took 22 minutes to reach the top - much better than the 40 minutes I took last week. Coming down was a problem as I had forgotten my hiking staff and always have to cope with my phobia of hiking accidents.
Perhaps now you can understand why this post is called an uphill task for a downhill trend. I am trying desperately to lose weight and it is absolutely a monumental task with all the goodies and treats I have been getting :-). Nonetheless, I am delighted with these gifts haha - no complaints :-).
To be honest, I told my husband that I would like to go for a brisk walk with him this morning but alas, I woke up at a disgraceful hour @ 9.30a.m. only because of an outstation call from Hobart's mom, Elaine.
Ah - it is a beautiful life to be lazy for once in my life :-) like today. After all, my whole body is aching...Whatever it is,, I am determined to continue to feel as though I am in my 20's, try my best to look like I am in my 30's when in actual fact, I am in my 40's LOL!!!
After I click the publish button, I am going on my exercise bike and then cool down on my treadmill before I do my weights and then shower and ZZZZzzzzzzzzzz....and then I willl blog again later n the afternoon.
Have a nice day folks and wish me luck as I continue my Get Fit program before I go for my medical check-up.
It is Monday and those of you who have to work must be up and about having meetings, rushing to meet deadlines and trying to keep up with the momentum after a relaxing weekend. So here's a selection of jokes and silly pics to make you smile and laugh your cares away. My apologies if any of these offend you for my intention is to entertain...Have a nice day!
For a start, here's a good way to get the men to take out the garbage.
An elderly woman went into the doctor's office. When the doctor asked why she was there, she replied, "I'd like to have some birth control pills."
Taken aback, the doctor thought for a minute and then said, "Excuse me, Mrs. Smith, but you're 75 years old. What possible use could you have for birth control pills?"
The woman responded, "They help me sleep better."
The doctor thought some more and continued, "How in the world do birth control pills help you to sleep?"
The woman said, "I put them in my granddaughter's orange juice and I sleep better at night."
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This one is specially for Cat-in-Sydney and all other cat lovers out there.
A cat dies and goes to Heaven. God meets him at the gate and says, 'You've been a good cat all of these years. Anything you desire is yours, all you have to do is ask.'
The cats says, 'Well, I lived all my life with a poor family on a farm and had to sleep on hardwood floors.' God says, 'Say no more.' And instantly, a fluffy pillow appears. A few days later, 6 mice are killed in a tragic accident and they go to Heaven. God meets them at the gate with the same offer that He made the cat.
The mice said, 'All our lives we've had to run. We've been chased by cats, dogs and even women with brooms. If we could only have a pair of roller skates, we wouldn't have to run anymore.' God says, 'Say no more.' And instantly, each mouse is fitted with a beautiful pair of tiny roller skates.
About a week later, God decides to check and see how the cat is doing. The cat is sound asleep on his new pillow. God gently wakes him and asks,
'How are you doing? Are you happy here?'
The cat yawns and stretches and says, 'Oh, I've never been happier in my life. And those Meals on Wheels you've been sending over are the best.
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Penguin Car Troubles :-)
This penguin was having car problems, so he pulled his car into the garage for a check-up. The mechanic points at the restaurant across the street and says, "Go over there and get a bite to eat, and I'll take a look." The penguin does exactly as he says.
After a while he waddles back, and the mechanic is looking under the hood. The penguin asks him if he's been able to figure out what went wrong. The mechanic glances over his shoulder and says, "It looks like you blew a seal."
The penguin quickly wipes his mouth and says, "Oh, no, no --That's just tartar sauce."
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The Shiftkey FAQ
Q: My shift keys have little arrows on them. Does that mean the *real* shift keys are located above them, and these keys are just little signs to point them out?
A: Nope, they're the Real McCoy. The little arrows mean "up", as in "look up at the screen". Your keyboard is telling you to learn to touch type and quit staring at your fingers.
Q: What happens if I press both shift keys?
A: Even bigger letters may show up on your screen. You should not use this feature, however, because these letters are also brighter, and may cause Screen Burn-In, which would be particularly embarrassing if you were typing something naughty at the time. You might consider obtaining the author's Shift Key Burn-In Protector program for only $139.95. Or you might not, it's your computer, but don't say I didn't warn you.
Q: my religion prohibits the use of shift keys. how can i type capital letters and punctuation
A: Discuss alternatives to the shift key with your spiritual advisor. Perhaps your deity would not be angered by repeated use of the Caps Lock key, or maybe you can retain a consultant to depress the shift for you. You might also consider replacing punctuation marks that require the use of shift keys with lower case expressions; replace ? with "huh" and ! with "zowie".
Q: I PRESSED SHIFT AND IT"S STUCK DOWN NOW
A: Do small children with a fondness for peanut butter use your keyboard frequently? If so, you may want to clean it off for more reliable operation. First, disconnect your keyboard by gripping each of its ends firmly and pulling as hard as you can. Next, immerse the keyboard in warm water and scrub thoroughly with your favorite lemon-scented detergent and lots of steel wool. Finally, you need to dry the keyboard. Either dry it to touch with a handheld blowdryer, or place it it the dryer for not less than 60 minutes. Be sure to clean the lint screen when you are finished.
Q:Why are there are no "shift" keys on my keyboard, but there are two keys labelled "hif"?
A:Again, you may want to consider cleaning your keyboard, and washing your hands more frequently for that matter.
Q:Are there shift keys on my Macintosh?
A:Yes, although instead of the notation "shift", the key may be labelled with an excited Mac face, something like :O . Press this key to use shift, and be thankful you're using a friendly Mac instead of a mean old PC with all them confusin' words 'n stuff on it.
Q:I'm sick of pushing the shift key every single time I want big letters. Is there any other way to do this?
A:This is the Modern Age of Convenience, and you may be able to activate the shift key merely with the power of your voice! Check to see whether your computer is equippped with speech-recognition equipment by saying the word "shift" very clearly and slowly into its speaker. Then watch the keyboard closely to see if the Shift key moves down. Note that you may have to repeat this action several times to "train" the computer to recognize your voice before the feature works reliably.
Q:There are two shift keys, which should I use?
A:Avoid unnecessary wear on either shift key by alternating between the two. Keep track of your usage of each key so that you press them in equal amounts. Your keyboard may be equipped with a small notepad; you should use this to make little tally marks in two columns for each time you shift. Remember, it's better to go to a little trouble than wind up with a broken shift key.
Q:Why are the shift keys bigger than the other keys?
A:They aren't. This is simply an optical illusion. Just as the moon appears much larger when it is close to the horizon, your shift keys look larger because of their proximity to other keys. To verify this, go out in a large field at night with your keyboard, place it in an upright position, and view it from a distance of 200 yards. Sure enough, the keys all look the same size!
Q: If I press the shift key at the wrong time, or too many times, will my computer explode?
A: No. Well, generally no. Not unless you are using a NEC laptop. Or vt100 terminal emulation. But even then, hardly ever. Really, don't worry about it. Forget I mentioned it. Just type softly. Move along, next question.
Q: No matter what I do, the shift key just doesn't seem to work. What's wrong?
A: Have you ever considered that the problem may not be your keyboard, the problem may be YOU? Perhaps God Himself has suspended the operation of these keys to send you a Message that you have strayed from the path of righteousness. Use this as an opportunity to reflect on your life. Before rushing blindly ahead with a lot of shifting, consult the spiritual advisor of your choice for help in dealing with any unresolved issues in your relationship with the Almighty.
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The IT Cafe
Customer: Waiter!
Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill and I'll be your Support Waiter. What seems to be the problem?
Customer: There's a fly in my soup!
Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.
Customer: No, it's still there.
Waiter: Maybe it's the way you're using the soup; try eating it with a fork instead.
Customer: Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.
Waiter: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl are you using?
Customer: A SOUP bowl!
Waiter: Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it's a configuration problem; how was the bowl set up?
Customer: You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that to do with the fly in my soup?
Waiter: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?
Customer: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!
Waiter: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?
Customer: You have more than one Soup of the Day each day?
Waiter: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.
Customer: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?
Waiter: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.
Customer: Fine. Bring me the tomato soup and the check. I'm running late now.
[Waiter leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the check.]
Waiter: Here you are, Sir. The soup and your check.
Customer: This is potato soup.
Waiter: Yes, the tomato soup wasn't ready yet.
Customer: Well, I'm so hungry now, I'll eat anything.
[Waiter leaves.]
Customer: Waiter! Now there's a mosquito in my soup!
The check:
Soup of the Day . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . $ 5.00
Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day. . . $ 2.50
Access to support . . . . . . . . . . . . . . $10.00
Editors Note: Bug in the soup........included at no extra charge (will be fixed with Tomorrow's soup of the day)
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Sarah's Legs
A guy walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Hey, buddy, if you can think of a good name for this bar, I'll give you a free beer."
So the guy goes outside and tries to think of a name. A beautiful lady walks by and he asks her her name. "Sarah," she says. He looks at her incredible legs and realizes "Sarah's Legs" would make a great name for the bar. He goes back inside and tells this story to the bartender, who immediately agrees and renames the bar "Sarah's Legs."
The next day, the guy is sitting outside the same bar when a lady walks by and asks, "What are you doing out here, handsome?"
"Oh, he answers, "I'm just waiting for Sarah's Legs to open so I can have a couple of quick ones."
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Can I See the Manager?
This tall, beautiful woman coyly asks to see the manager of a bar. The bartender is interested in this woman and decides to handle the matter himself. He says, "What can I do for you?"
She walks closer, which gets him more excited. "No, I don't think you can help me," she purrs, "I really have to talk to the manager."
By this time she's leaned onto the bar, thus showing some of her cleavage. The bartender says, "I'm sorry, but the manager isn't avaiable right now, but I'll be happy to help you any way I can."
So she gets a bit closer to him and starts rubbing her hands through his hair and across his lips. The bartender is very turned on now and says breathlessly, "So what is it that I can do for you?"
She gets even closer and allows the bartender to suck slowly on her fingers. Then she says, "Can you tell your manager there's no toilet paper in the ladies' room?"
As a bookworm and bibliophile, I worm my way around during book fairs looking out for not just bargains but also gems that I can find. One book which I bought last year for only RM9.90 is “Shackleton’s Way” written by Margot Morrell and Stephanie Capparell with a preface written by Alexandra Shackleton.
A year before that, I had seen the book priced at RM70 and then the price went down to RM30.90 and finally I got it at a 70% discount off that price!
Never in my life did I dream that this book would offer me a rich abundance of lessons for meeting the leadership challenges that one can encounter in life.
A thrilling survival story, “”Shackleton’s Way” makes an inspirational handbook for a new generation of leaders.
He has been called the greatest leader that ever came on God’s earth, bar none. In 1914, Sir Ernest Shackleton led twenty-seven men, for almost two years, through a harrowing fight for their lives after the wreck of their Antarctic vessel, Endurance, left them stranded on an ice floe twelve hundred miles from civilization with no means of communication and no hope for rescue.
The temperatures were so low that men could hear water freeze. They subsisted on a diet of penguins, dogs and seals. And when the ice began to break up, Shackleton set out to save them all on his heroic eight-hundred-mile trip across the frigid South Atlantic - in little more than a rowboat.
Unlike most other polar expeditions, every man survived not only in good health but also in good spirits and every man ascribed it to Shackleton’s superb leadership.
Nearly a century later, this once-overlooked explorer is riding a wave of “Shackleton mania.” Yet nowhere have the secrets of Shackleton’s leadership success been fully analyzed. Shackleton’s Way draws on anecdotes, crew diaries, contemporary material, and interviews with some of today’s leaders to illustrate Shackleton’s tactics.
This book offers readers opportunities to learn how to manage crises with limited personnel and resources, how to create order out of chaos, how to hire good workers, how to support and inspire employees to do their best, and how to lead by personal example–with optimism, egalitarianism, humor, strength, ingenuity, intelligence, and compassion. Shackleton’s Way is a fascinating and practical case study of a leader who triumphed by putting people first and striving for the seemingly impossible when all the odds were against him.
Margot Mowell and Stephanie Capparell have turned Shackleton’s effective methods into a leadership handbook that reads like an adventure story!!! What is brilliant about this book is that the authors have shown me how successful readers have patterned themselves on the incomparable Antarctic explorer. Better still, they have successfully codified his winning strategies for the rest of us.
You must get your hands on this book because Shackleton’s story captures the true essence of leadership to help each person achieve his best in order to achieve what some view as the impossible.
Certainly, the lessons in this book are timeless and invaluable. Please do not miss out on the opportunity to benefit from these timeless lessons.
Happy reading, enjoy the rest of the day!
