masterwordsmith-unplugged

Have you read the greatest Malaysian joke in cyberspace? If you have not, get ready for a lot of laughs at THIS LINK. I think my eyeballs nearly popped out when I read this article that is so mischievous and bordering absurdities and lunacy! I am surprised the writer even reported it and wonder why it was even carried by the MSM in the first place. Why are the authorities concerned not taking this organization to task for such statements?



Excerpt:

Malay nationalist group Perkasa warns that the Chinese community will use the next general election to take over the country.

Perkasa feels that the last general election weakened the Malays and empowered the Chinese community.

Dr Zubir Harun, director of Perkasa’ economic bureau, who was at the Malay Consultative Council’s (MPM) round-table discussion, said during his presentation that a divided Malay community will empower the other races.

According to delegates at the discussion and documents received by The Malaysian Insider, Perkasa wants the New Economic Policy (NEP) to be the “spirit” of the New Economic Model (NEM).

“Perkasa believes that disunity among the Malays has weakened Umno, causing the non-Malays to be more vocal in their demands. They say that the Chinese are also blackmailing the government to give in to their demands by threatening to vote for Pakatan Rakyat,” said one of the delegates.

Zubir also said that Perkasa is worried that the New Economic Model will have a Chinese agenda.

“The Chinese people feel that the next general election is the best opportunity for them to gain power in this country.

“This is why Chinese NGOs, such as Ziong Dong and Associated Chinese Chambers of Commerce, are using this chance to make demands of the government. If their demands are not met, then they will vote Pakatan Rakyat who are willing to give everything to the Chinese,” he elaborated in his presentation. Click HERE to read more.

Some questions:

* How is it that some people or MSM can get away with any statement even if these can incite racial tension?

* What is said in this article goes against the New Economic Model which could indirectly mean that they do not give their support to the PM which could be interpreted as the absence of loyalty to the Head of government which could mean.......!!!

* Do the remarks in this article sound seditious? If so, how come the people concerned have not been hauled up for questioning?

* Some of the statements are insulting to UMNO. I wonder if these characters are still UMNO members and if they are, how come they have not been hauled up for disciplinary action?

* Why are Chinese the scapegoats???

* Does the speaker concerned have any intention of instigating certain quarters? If the authorities perceive it as such, how come he seems to have special immunity like the other infamous MSM?

I hope that leaders from both sides of the divide and other organizations such as Chinese NGOs, such as Ziong Dong and Associated Chinese Chambers of Commerce will speak out against such malicious and mischievous statements which do nothing positive for this country. What an outrage!!!

I could go on and on but I am sure you, dear reader, can see more than I can at the moment. Please leave a comment to share your view of this situation. Thanks! Have a lovely evening.

In the beginning, God created heaven and earth. Shortly thereafter God was in receipt of a notice to show cause why he shouldn't be cited for failure to file an environmental impact statement. He was granted a temporary planning permit for the project, but was stymied by a Cease and Desist Order for the earthly part.



At the hearing, God was asked why he began his earthly project in the first place. He replied that he just liked to be creative.

Then God said, "Let there be light."

Officials immediately demanded to know how the light would be made. Would it require strip mining? What about thermal pollution?

God explained that the light would come from a huge ball of fire, and provisional approval was granted with the proviso that no smoke would result.

The authorities demanded the issuance of a building permit, and (to conserve energy) required that the light be left off half the time. God agreed, saying he would call the light "Day" and the darkness "Night." Officials replied that they were only interested in protecting the environment, not in semantics.

God said, "Let the earth bring forth green herb and such as many seed."

The EPA agreed, so long as only native seed was used.

Then God said, "Let waters bring forth creeping creatures having life; and the fowl that may fly over the earth."

Officials pointed out this would require approval from the Department of Game coordinated with the Heavenly Wildlife Federation and the Audubongelic Society.

Everything went along smoothly until God declared that he intended to complete the project in six days.

Officials informed God it would take at least 200 days to review his many waiver applications and environmental impact statements. After that there would have to be a public hearing, and then there would be a 10-12 month probationary period before....

At this point, God created Hell.

-Author Unknown-
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How Government Works

Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert.
Congress said,"Someone may steal from it at night." So they created a night watchman position and hired a person for the job.

Then Congress said,"How does the watchman do his job without instruction?" So they created a planning department and hired two people, one person to write the instructions, and one person to do time studies.

Then Congress said,"How will we know the night watchman is doing the tasks correctly?" So they created a Quality Control department and hired two people. One to do the studies and one to write the reports.

Then Congress said,"How are these people going to get paid?" So they created the following positions, a time keeper, and a payroll officer, then hired two people.

Then Congress said,"Who will be accountable for all of these people?" So they created an administrative section and hired three people, an Administrative Officer, Assistant Administrative Officer, and a Legal Secretary.

Then Congress said,"We have had this command in operation for one year and we are $18,000 over budget, we must cutback overall cost." So they laid off the night watchman.

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Three Boys
Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging of how great their fathers are.

The first one says:"Well, my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow".

The second one says:"Ha! You think that's fast! My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet".

The third one listens to the other two and shakes his head. He then says:"You two know nothing about fast. My father is a civil servant. He stops working at 4:30 and he is home by 3:45!!"
Political Brains
A Guy walks into a store. He sees three brains on display. One is a Libertarian Brain, priced at $250. The second is a Democrat Brain, priced at $275. The third is a Republican Brain, priced at $5,000,000.

The Guy asks the sales clerk,"Man, why does the Republican brain cost so much more than the other two?"

Clerk replies,"Well, sir, that brain has never been used.


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Do leave a comment if you wish to share your views. I hope the humor here has brought a smile to your face. May this week be a fantastic one for you and yours. Have a great day!

Did you know that it was only recently that our Government became more aggressive with regards to consolidating its financial position? In reality, the Government is implementing mechanisms that can reduce its persistent financial deficits and increasing burden of debt. As such, has to seek ways to develop a surplus for rainy days ahead. One of the ways is via the proposal of introducing a new tax format, called the goods and services tax (GST), or value-added tax (VAT) as it is known in some countries.



Just a few days ago at THIS LINK, Deputy Finance Minister Chor Chee Heung announced that Malaysia will see a gradual reduction in its corporate and income tax rates once the proposed Goods and Services Tax (GST) is in place by mid-2011.

The report said:

"This is a long-term objective of the government. Once the GST come into play, it will be a broadbased tax and the trend is, once GST is implemented, corporate and income taxes will gradually be reduced," he said here Thursday.

Speaking to reporters after officiating the PTD (government administrative and diplomatic sercie) Alumni Policy Dialiogue on the GST, he said, however, he did not think there was a timeline for achieving this reduction in corporate and income taxes.

Chor also disclosed that businesses related to services such as those in the food and transportation sectors, would be exempted from the proposed GST. He also assured that the cost of living and lifestyle of the people would not increase or be affected with the implentation of a GST.

The implementation of GST would not cause inflation either, he said, adding: "Once the GST is in, the service tax and sales tax (now imposed) would be abolished. Both taxes are quite high at 10 per cent and five per cent respectively. The GST at four per cent is considered very low." CLICK HERE to read more.

The GST Bill was tabled for its first reading in Parliament last December. The second reading will take place during the parliamentary session beginning later this month.

This evening at 8.00pm, PAKATAN RAKYAT PULAU PINANG will be holding a FORUM ON GST that will feature YB Tony Pua (MP PJ Utara, DAP, YB Dr. Dzulkefly Ahmad (MP K. Selangor, PAS) and En. Mohd. Rafizi Ramli (CEO of Selangor Economic Advisory Office). The forum will be held at Penang Caring Society Complex, Jalan Utama (Next to Governor's Residence). If you are in Penang, please come for this meeting to know more about GST and how it will affect you.

I am no economist but from what I have read and studied, I thought I'd share a few basic points to get us ready for GST in Malaysia.

What is GST? GST is a tax on spending that will cover all types of goods & services sold to Malaysian & non-Malaysian residents (therefore consumers) except for a common commodities such as rice, flour & sugar.

How will it affect you? In future, whenever you buy something or pay for a service (even parking fees!!!), you will be charged additional ~% (the proposed additional 4%) on top of your bill except for certain controlled items.

The rationale: More funds for development and expenses.

Estimated revenue: A whopping RM1 billion (RM1,000,000,000) per annum

Will inflation occur? Whether you like it or not, the reality is that it will affect the pockets of middle and lower income group Malaysians. Please do not forget that even without GST, the cost of living in Malaysia has increased. The prices of petrol and commodities have escalated and we are going to have GST? Our PM and Deputy Finance Minister have said that inflation will not occur. Let's be realistic. With the introduction of GST, the chain of ‘passing the cost’ will end up usually at the hands of consumers. And what will that mean? Do your mathematics and reach your own conclusion. Along the way, think of those who are poor - the unemployed, the handicapped, single parents, the elderly etc.

What about implementation? There will be a slow & steady tax preparation so that individuals and small businesses will not be adversely affected. Implementation will not occur until middle to late 2011 or 2012.

GST will replace the 10+5% services and goods tax. This means taxes are lower now – Consumers need not pay more for one area, but it’s divided into many other source of ‘tax’ payments.

GST rates are promised at 4%, out of the normal 10% or 5% charged in restaurants.

If you want to know more, come and hear it from the experts tonight at 8.00pm, Kompleks Penyayang, Jalan Utama, Penang.

In closing, here's a poem that was sent to me via email re the GST. You may laugh at it now but I foresee the situation will be much worse in Malaysia when the GST is implemented!


REFLECTION OF A TYPICAL SINGAPOREAN
I am Ong Ah Tee living in Kampong Chai Chee
Life used to be simple and HAPPY
I worked hard in my STUDY
I learned A-B-C, and everything from 1, 2, and 3.
Primary school was quite easy I passed PSLE

Then I went to SECONDARY
The subjects include HISTORY, GEOGRAPHY
Physics, Biology and CHEMISTRY
After O levels I went to JC

They said you live in Singapore very LUCKY
This is a small humid tropical COUNTRY
Surrounded by unknown potential ENEMIES

Boys turned 18 must go to ARMY for the tour of duty
After that we may continue our Studies
The girls can just sit back, relax, and watch TV
They come to this world only to "lim kopi, kway jit chee
No one lives on free meals or depends on CHARITY

I want to take up IT, but I had no money to go to University or Poly
So I went to work at FACTORY
Working hard to earn a little lousy SALARY
After CPF and INCOME TAX, I have just enough money to buy ROTI and ride in MRT.

My bosses show me no SYMPATHY
Mumbling over my shoulder daily: "HURRY, HURRY and HURRY !"
Accusing me of always trying to get MC
But my sickness was due to over stretch OT
Going home after midnight by TAXI
And they pay me only bus fee

My colleague likes me because of my honesty and can easily bully
They said I don't know how to carry.
I Park-Tor and became STEADY
Finally had to MARRY
Because gahment gave baby bonus MONEY

I lost money holding Wedding Dinner PARTY
Cheeky friends donating only cheap PANTY
After marriage, nothing was EASY

In one year, I became DADDY
I can't support my family and our BABY
Being tied down for life to repay 2 rooms HDB and rising monthly
utilities to PUB
My bank account has NO MONEY
POSB balance is almost EMPTY
DBS wants to charge me EXTRA FEE
Insisting that "Nothing is FREE!"

So I moonlight as KARANG GUNI
Many times I want to jump MRT
But that is not EASY
My wife cries: "Who is going to support me and our BABY?"
So I can't MATI

I went to seek assis tan ce from the MP
His reply was simple and easy
"Vote for me, vote for me, vote for me".
He never tells me any convincing Policy.

How to help the poor with more GST?

Why I cannot have pay increase but they can have increase?
Before, my MP said "Vote for me, we give you sweeties".
Now, they want to increase salary, because "You voted me"..


They claim they made good economy for our country.
They benchmark themselves using GDP.
They said, "To get the best man, you have to pay high fee"
otherwise, they will join MNC. /
And all your 'char bor' become maids in other COUNTRY.

Next will be the GST.
My boss say "no" to increase in salary,

It's really make me worry.
Our Health Ministry said let GP set their consultation fee.
If the GP charges high fee, don't let them see.
No money, how can healthy
If fall sick, can only mati
In hospital, can afford Class C.
I don't mind all nurses are aunty,
But only one doctor to see
No money for operation, I Tan Si.

Do you think GST will benefit Malaysians? Do leave a comment if you wish to share your views about GST.Thanks! Have a nice day!