1. If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out.
2. Age is a high price for maturity.
3. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage
makes you a mechanic.
4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you have never tried before.
6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
8. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government programme.
10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
11. Bills travel through the post at twice the speed of cheques.
12. A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
14. Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. Deal with it.
15. No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes.
16. A balanced diet is a biscuit in each hand.
17. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
18. Middle age is when broadness of mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
19. Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.
20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognise a mistake when you make it
again.
22. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
23. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
24. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.
25. Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.
3 comments to 25 PHRASES OF WISDOM
-
ocho-onda May I add one more to your list !
I heard this one when I was in Brazil - you know how both the Brazilians and Argentinians always claim that each is better than the other at soccer ? This is what the Brazilians had to say about the Argentinian ( Maradonna's) ego :-
The man's ego is so gigantic that he will probably kill himself just by jumping off it !
Cheers.
-
Unknown Dear Ocho-Onda,
You are most welcome...Actually, I read lots and lots everyday and choose the best to share with readers. After all, what can an baby boomer like me do at home besides housework and other family duties? :-) This keeps me sane and mentally alert!!
I reckon that I must cut across the board in blogging because if I were to emphasize just the negative aspects of life, we were all become grouches or Tom Dooleys; yet to be all goey and sentimental might make us too Leondardo Di Caprioish ala Titanic..and those who know me can vouch that I love laughter, humor although I must admit that at times, I can be a tragedy queen (but rarely know thank goodness for that!!!)
*grins* I like your South American joke. Gosh I was such a die-hard George Best, then Schumacher, then Maradona fan. Yup! I am a football maniac and in my younger days, hubby and I dated at the City Stadium of Penang, watching Soh Chin Aun, the late Mokhtar Dahari and the other football greats, none of which the current breed can compare...
Thanks for reading my posts and for visiting. It means a lot to me knowing that you and other readers are reading these stuff that I put up.
Have a nice day and God bless you!
ocho-onda Dear Paula,
Thanks for all your wonderful light hearted but often meaningful postings. I am sure that is what the world needs - more laughter !
I wish I have more time to read through your constant and seemingly unending supply. In fact, that is what I am doing now - back reading to catch up ! :-) Cheers. Have a nice day !