masterwordsmith-unplugged

Yesterday, I received an email from a girlfriend of mine who lives in another country. She is almost 60 years old and I always tease her as to how she and her hubby must be enjoying the most romantic times together. We used to chat on MSN almost every morning, laughing most of the time but since November 2008, I stopped using MSN and sadly, also stopped chatting with her and my godsons and goddaughters even though I have invited her to chat with me via Skype upon appointment LOL because I do not log on unless there is an appointment haha - too much to do and blog!!!

Excerpt from her email which prompted me to do this post:

Anyway, cannot talk to you via skype at night lah....trying to teach my hubby how to court his Golden Oldie again!! LOL. He's got dementia and does not even know the correct way to hold my hand...after I've forcefully shuffed it into his! Sigh! Have to tell him that that is when he has to curl his fingers round mine so it does not fall away!! LOL!!

Anyway, this post is specially dedicated to her, my dear dear *****, whom I know reads my blog to see almost daily to see if I am alive :-), with the hope that she and her hubby plus all my married or cohabitating friends, will have many romantic years together.

To me, whether you are in a relationship or single, romance is as necessary a part of life as breathing. :-) A day spent focusing on romance can be thought of as Focus on Love day. And a focus on love day will nurture and recharge your spirit and your relationship. Here are some suggestions to create a romantic ambiance in your home..(I know ;) I am a sentimental romantic at heart!)

The suggestions are for couples and singles - to show no discrimination :-) because whether single or married, it is all up to us to be happy!

1. The Perfect Day

Couples: Subtly question your lover about what they picture as the perfect day. Focus on Love day - then create it for him or her.
Singles: If you had a partner, what would you have them do to create your perfect Focus on Love day? Create it for yourself - love yourself that much.

2. The Perfect Card + One Perfect Rose

Couples: Buy or make a lovely card and then fill it to the brim with words of love, admiration and appreciation. When I say fill it to the brim, I mean leave no white space untouched. Present it with one perfect rose. Years ago, my dear husband gave me a single pink rose for Valentine's Day - a plastic rose. ;) When he saw my expression, he said that a plastic rose can last better than a real rose - pragmatic man...by the way, I still have that pink rose!
Singles: Buy or make a lovely card for yourself, and just as above, fill it to the brim with words you want to hear from your future lover. Seal the envelope. Present it to yourself with one perfect rose.

3. A Lover's Day and not a Woman's Day

Couples: Ladies, I have it on good authority that guys want to be celebrated too. So, get him flowers and candy and cards, too.
Singles: Guys, give yourself that same wonderful day as a relationship partner would give you. You may feel silly, but you will also feel good.

4. Say Goodbye to Obligation, Say Hello to Open Heart

Couples: Don't give or do anything from obligation this Focus on Love day. Give only from your heart, from love and treasuring your partner.
Singles: Don't beat yourself up for not having a partner yet. You have not failed. You are not bad. Create a Focus on Love for Yourself day.

5. The Gift of Undivided Attention

Couples: Give your partner the gift of undivided attention and see if she or he doesn't find that the most romantic thing going.
Singles: Give yourself the gift of your own undivided attention. Take away all of the distractions and be with yourself the way you would want your partner to be with you.

6. Gift of Communication

Couples: Men, allow your woman to talk about whatever her heart desires, and listen with out fixing at all.
Ladies, let your man talk or answer your question with out finishing his sentences for him, interrupting him, or moving on to the next topic.(hehehe I used to do that) See if this doesn't make sparks fly.
Singles: Either find a person who will listen to you the way you need to be heard, or give yourself space and time to listen to your own thoughts and feelings.

7. Gift of Communication II

Couples: Ladies, give your man the gift of sitting down next to him in silence. No talking allowed. After 25 years with hubby, I have learnt the beauty of silence....he is a quiet man and I used to talk endlessly n he would listen. Then I would force him to talk n if he did not, and if there was no response....ah...but now, we are older and wiser and I have learnt, truly learnt, the beauty of silence with him...er but not for too longhahaha!
Men, give your lady the gift of talking and sharing from your heart. No closing down, walling off or running away allowed.
Singles: Either silence or open heart, give yourself which ever one you need.

8. A Gift with Interest

Couples: Is your partner into computers, and you don't know a mouse from a monitor? Or is she into gardening, but to you a rose is just a rose? Give your partner the gift of your interest in something that is important to him or her. Go ahead, ask him or her a question about it and see the smile light up his or her face.
Singles: Give yourself the gift of time to pursue your important interest. Take the time to do something that nourishes you and makes you happy.

9. The Trust

Couples: Ladies, give the man in your life the gift of trusting him to know how and when to take care of himself and you. Learn how to be subtle.
Gentlemen, hold her trust sacred, and learn to listen for subtle requests.
Singles: Today trust your process and your fate. Today trust that you too will be loved and cherished.

10. A Shower of Words

Couples: Write your loved one a love letter or poem and read it to them. Here come the tears.
Singles: Write yourself a love letter or poem, exactly the way you would want it written by a lover. Read it to yourself out loud and have Kleenex ready. And never lose hope! Love yourself, believe in yourself and be happy no matter what!