In your younger days, were you ever bullied in school?
“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life. Define yourself.”
~Harvey Fierstein ~
Do you allow people to talk to you in a demeaning way? It has happened to me.
Do some people insult you with words that hurt you? It has happened to me.
Are you the type to allow others to talk to you in an unacceptable manner? And then laugh or mock at you when you get hurt? It has happened to me.
I am reminded of a conversation I had with a friend of mine who constantly complained about her best friend who took every opportunity to talk down to her and criticize her no matter what she did. When she achieved accomplishments, the friend would laugh. When she made a mistake, condemnation would follow and she would be filled with feelings of shame that overcame her after those episodes made her feel so “small” and belittled to the point where she felt completely helpless.
Obviously, such a situation eroded her self-esteem and left her feeling terribly frustrated and unhappy and she became miserable.
Even though she knew she had to put a stop to this madness, she did not have the courage to overcome the situation. So she let it gnaw at her, deprive her of sleep, stress her out and totally throw her life out of balance. For some reason, she just could not stand up for herself.
Why was she putting up with it? Simple. It was because she and the old friend had known each other since their childhood.
But from my personal experience, when we are caught between a rock and a hard place, we must use an extra muscle to help us to survive the situation while waiting for better opportunities to come along.
In simple terms, STAND UP FOR YOURSELF! I used to be afraid of doing that for fear that I might hurt others or for fear of being rejected. Nope. Madam here has a different philosophy of life now, especially after my recent experiences and madam ain't gonna suffer no nonsense, not like she used to in the past. Madam here ain't gonna be 'Chinese' in standing on ceremony and then to suffer in silence. Neither will madam ever allow anyone to talk down to her if she has done no wrong and has a clear conscience. Nope. I will fire away now if I have to if I have to defend myself- no holds barred!!! Of course, sometimes, it will not be worth the effort to do so thus I would just dismiss it, smile and walk away from those characters and thereafter have nothing to do with them. I have a voice - one that God gave me and I will speak up and not have fear in my heart if misunderstood or bullied.
This muscle is your voice. It allows you to speak up for yourself and express your opinion in a manner that doesn’t infringe on others while still making your position clearly known. It represents your truth and allows you to maintain integrity with yourself.
Speak up for yourself. Don’t be a victim. Don't please others. Love yourself!
Be assertive.
Stand up for yourself.
You are the first flicker of hope in your life and the engine of change in your situation. The change must begin with how you perceive yourself. It requires courage and self-love.
Speaking up for yourself doesn’t necessarily mean being confrontational.
Learn to deal with conflict without being aggressive.
One simple step is to learn how to say NO!
Let people know when something is unacceptable and when your rights are being violated.
Don’t feel guilty or explain why you said NO or why you did what you did because you have a right to say NO and it is your life (as long as you did not break any law of course).
Or, if you are the peace-loving type of character, just walk away and don’t listen. Sometimes it is not worth explaining yourself to certain characters. Walking away, ignoring them is the best avenue.
Don’t lose your sanity over a nasty character. He/She is not worth it!
Suffer no more. Life is for living!
Find your voice, speak up, stand up for yourself and enjoy your life today!
Have a wonderful evening!
“The soul that is within me no man can degrade.”
~Fredrick Douglas~
“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life. Define yourself.”
~Harvey Fierstein ~
Do you allow people to talk to you in a demeaning way? It has happened to me.
Do some people insult you with words that hurt you? It has happened to me.
Are you the type to allow others to talk to you in an unacceptable manner? And then laugh or mock at you when you get hurt? It has happened to me.
I am reminded of a conversation I had with a friend of mine who constantly complained about her best friend who took every opportunity to talk down to her and criticize her no matter what she did. When she achieved accomplishments, the friend would laugh. When she made a mistake, condemnation would follow and she would be filled with feelings of shame that overcame her after those episodes made her feel so “small” and belittled to the point where she felt completely helpless.
Obviously, such a situation eroded her self-esteem and left her feeling terribly frustrated and unhappy and she became miserable.
Even though she knew she had to put a stop to this madness, she did not have the courage to overcome the situation. So she let it gnaw at her, deprive her of sleep, stress her out and totally throw her life out of balance. For some reason, she just could not stand up for herself.
Why was she putting up with it? Simple. It was because she and the old friend had known each other since their childhood.
But from my personal experience, when we are caught between a rock and a hard place, we must use an extra muscle to help us to survive the situation while waiting for better opportunities to come along.
In simple terms, STAND UP FOR YOURSELF! I used to be afraid of doing that for fear that I might hurt others or for fear of being rejected. Nope. Madam here has a different philosophy of life now, especially after my recent experiences and madam ain't gonna suffer no nonsense, not like she used to in the past. Madam here ain't gonna be 'Chinese' in standing on ceremony and then to suffer in silence. Neither will madam ever allow anyone to talk down to her if she has done no wrong and has a clear conscience. Nope. I will fire away now if I have to if I have to defend myself- no holds barred!!! Of course, sometimes, it will not be worth the effort to do so thus I would just dismiss it, smile and walk away from those characters and thereafter have nothing to do with them. I have a voice - one that God gave me and I will speak up and not have fear in my heart if misunderstood or bullied.
This muscle is your voice. It allows you to speak up for yourself and express your opinion in a manner that doesn’t infringe on others while still making your position clearly known. It represents your truth and allows you to maintain integrity with yourself.
Speak up for yourself. Don’t be a victim. Don't please others. Love yourself!
Be assertive.
Stand up for yourself.
You are the first flicker of hope in your life and the engine of change in your situation. The change must begin with how you perceive yourself. It requires courage and self-love.
Speaking up for yourself doesn’t necessarily mean being confrontational.
Learn to deal with conflict without being aggressive.
One simple step is to learn how to say NO!
Let people know when something is unacceptable and when your rights are being violated.
Don’t feel guilty or explain why you said NO or why you did what you did because you have a right to say NO and it is your life (as long as you did not break any law of course).
Or, if you are the peace-loving type of character, just walk away and don’t listen. Sometimes it is not worth explaining yourself to certain characters. Walking away, ignoring them is the best avenue.
Don’t lose your sanity over a nasty character. He/She is not worth it!
Suffer no more. Life is for living!
Find your voice, speak up, stand up for yourself and enjoy your life today!
Have a wonderful evening!
“The soul that is within me no man can degrade.”
~Fredrick Douglas~
Chahya Thank you for sharing this.
Been there, but never again.
You're right, say NO when one should. Be true to oneself, and be the soul that one is. Take it or leave.