masterwordsmith-unplugged

Yipppeeee!!! I am connected (er...but for how long, I have no idea!).

I would have written this last night if I had had internet connection...anyway, better late than never.

My older boy came home last night sans his musical instruments but with his laptop of course. The minute he entered the car, I told him, "Son, I have bad news for you. There is no internet connection."

"WHHHHHAAAATTTTT?????"

"And the house phone is kaput as well."

A louder "WHHHAAAAAAAATTTTTTTT" followed.

Later in the evening, I had to tell his lovely girlfriend that we really did not have internet connection which was why my boy could not chat with her.

The minute we reached home, my older boy headed for the study and zoomed in straight to his younger brother's violin while Nick zoomed in straight for his psp which had come home ;-). He lent it to his brother when we were in KL last month.

So my older boy started jamming on the violin and mom here started doing the laundry as I had told him to bring back all his dirty laundry.

As I put the dirty laundry into the washing machine, I recalled the times when he was just a baby.

Being a greenie, I only used disposable diapers at night so I spent my days and nights hand washing all his cotton diapers...and I did the same for my younger boy. You might not believe this but the diapers are still as good as new and I am keeping them for my grandchildren :-).

It seemed like only a while ago when Jon was born and I shuddered when I recalled how he used to bawl his head off for his milk. As am inexperienced mom, I was panicky and didn't know what to do. Somehow, he must have sensed those vibes because it seemed as though he too was fretful.

As a baby, he woke up three times for his night feeds. For about two years, my hubby and I never had a proper night's sleep. My boy would cry and then both of us would jump out of bed as though we were in some special fire brigade squad. Hubby would cuddle him in his arms while I would run to make his milk.

Everything was on the table. Milk powder measured to perfection in the containers. Water filled to the right level in the milk bottle. All I had to do was to top up with the right amount of hot water, put the milk powder, shake it baby and hey presto - he would be quiet, enjoying his milk in my arms while daddy went back to sleep, at supersonic speed.

How time flies. In the twinkling of an eye, he was running around, running away from me because he hated haircuts and looked so adorable with his page-boy hairstyle - it was the easiest hairstyle for me to handle. His daddy would hold his legs, grandpa would hold his arms and yours truly would snip snip and there we go - a Paul McCartney look-alike :-). And I did not have to go to Vidal Sassoon to train :-).

Just last Wednesday, while I was waiting for my younger boy to be dismissed from his Scouts activity, I recalled those times when I used to wait for my older boy and how his friends would run to me to talk to me. Then my thoughts drifted to the days when I waited for him after school when he was at PFS and how I cried so much when he first left for university last year.

As I put each item into the washing machine, I realized that my son is now a man and that in no time, he will be working after which he wil get married, have his own home and family...And that the same thing will happen to my younger boy and then my hubby and I will only have each other in our empty nest.

Tears rolled down my eyes and I quickly regained my composure. I should be happy that my boy was back in my nest and I must relish these precious moments when he is with me....

Without further ado, I rushed downstairs and sat at the piano to jam with my boy. I could not believe how he makes giant leaps of improvement each time he comes home. This time, improvising is not a problem for him and to my delight, he is now even better than I am in jazz improvisation.

We started the evening with my favorite "Moon River" and took turns to do solo parts after the two verses. From there, we did "How High The Moon", "Feelings", "Something Stupid", "The Entertainer" and many other oldies...Oh - it was so lovely to play with him and my heart swelled with pride and happiness ...Years ago, I had to beg him to play with me and now, our styles just flowed together - me - the old jazz enthusiast, amateur pianist and Karen Carpenter/Ella Fitzgerald wannabe and he the contemporary music undergraduate who loves jazz ...and we played and sang and made beautiful music together.

Even in KL, we would do the same but with his girlfriend crooning away in her lovely husky voice. It was such a pity that Nick was poring over his psp instead of jamming with us but no worries, we will do that tonight :-).

And much later, as I was trying to get online for the thousandth time, my boy came over with his laptop and let me listen to his latest composition. Simply brilliant, recorded and sung by him...I just hope that he wins that songwriting competition.

When he retired to his room later, I heard him coughing. Walking down the stairs to the kitchen, my mind was filled with memories of the times he was ill and how I took care of him and how this is but a precious chance for me to 'mother' him. Dr. Mom here then took an anti-histamine and cough mixture plus a mug of water to his room, knocked on the door and went inside to find him watching "Yes Man".

With a smile, he knew what to do. After he took his medication, he said, "Mom, I miss that. I miss you. And I love you."

I smiled and said the same thing, turned away as quickly as I could before the dam burst and walked out of the room, tears streaming down my face.

How time flies.

If I could do it again, I would. And I would be a better mom. But I look back with no regrets, and I thank God for all the mistakes I made for I know that I love my boys through and true and I will always give my best to them....

So, if you have your own kids...cherish them...love them, nurture them.

I used to wish that Jon would grow us as quickly as he could but now, I wish I had the power to make time stand still...And I tell my Nick the same thing. Just a few days ago, I asked Nick if he could forever be a ten-year old and he laughed as he ran away from me when I tried to hug him tightly and kiss him on the head the way I love to do..Before my very eyes, he is shooting up. Even for Jon. At the doorstep last night, I was stunned as I realized that he has grown taller. He must easily be six feet two or three now.

My boys - Jonathan - the name which means "The Gift from God" and Nicholas whose name means "The Lord is victorious....my precious boys.

My only regret is that I stopped at two. Now, I understand why my gyny refused to ligate me and she tried to persuade me many times...but alas, I refused to listen...now, if only I did. I might even have three or four children....But it is ok. I am happy with my two boys and I know that they are both gifts from God, to teach me how to live, how to love, how to give and to understand the Fatherhood of God.

May God bless you richly if you are a parent and if you are longing to be one, may God bless you with many children...

Take care, enjoy your children and have a good day!