masterwordsmith-unplugged

The first of May. When I was small, and Christmas trees were tall, we used to love while others used to play. Don't ask me why, the time has passed us by. Someone else moved in from far away. Now we are tall and Christmas trees are small and you don't ask the time of day, but you and I, our love will never die. Guess who'll cry, come first of May.

Me. I am the one who cried my eyes out on the first of May - today.

My boy went back to KL exactly 2.5 hrs ago. Since last night, I have been heavy hearted...with no vigor, no strength to walk another step or to type another word. The piano has not been played and no jazz music has filled the house since Sunday...not until he comes back again next month.

OK. Enough sentimental emo nonsense. I am calm and composed now although my eyes hurt like crazy. I guess the fact that I cried everyday from mid November till the end of January kind of messed up my eyes for now, with a little bit of tears, my eyes hurt like crazy and it is like a self-regulatory mechanism for me to step on the brakes n put the stopper on my tear glands. Not easy to be a mom, an emo mom. During lunch (where I got ripped off and paid through my nose for some stupid yukky tim sum at ridiculous prices that are much higher than FORUM or Shang Palace), I turned to my hubby and said, "Gosh, it will be worse when Nick is gone." As if to exacerbate matters, he replied affirmatively, "Yes, most definitely."

So here I am, sans older boy, extra fats around my waist, staring at all his pics and missing him so much.

And this morning, my cousin Hoy called from US and told me that he misses me cos he was listening to Bee Gees crooning "First of May" and that put me in nostalgia lane all over again...Those of you who grew up in the 70's might remember the movie "S.W.A.L.K." where most of the girls had their first experience of puppy love (NOT ME NO WAY) with Mark Lester. So here it is - First of May by Bee Gees.




Listening to the song brings back so many memories. I remember it was in 1972 when my mom died in February and this movie was being screened at Capitol cinema, Penang. My cousin, Mary, took us all to watch "S.W.A.L.K." and in those days, going to the cinema was a REAL treat, especially if we sat upstairs.

Buying MENTOS which tasted far better than the ones we have now and then coming out during the interval (which was a must in those days) to buy an ice-cream cone was such a treat. Going to the movies is no longer the same experience as in the past. Now, instead of kacang putih, fruits and sugar cane drinks, kids today splurge on buy popcorn and fizzy drinks which are not cheap!

Growing up in the 1970's was so different from what teenagers experience today. Going out on a date meant going for a movie, fishing, a day at the beach, hiking or even cycling round Penang island. However, I hold the record for despite countless fishing trips, I have never ever caught a single fish in my life. We did not have fancy fishing rods or fishing accessories in toolboxes like my son's...all we needed was cacing (worms), sotong, prawns, the weights, hooks, nylon line and the ability to throw our weight, hook and bait far into the sea.

There we sat - along Esplanade, Gurney Drive, at my friend's bungalow "Adorable", Pantai Keracut, Muka Head, Pasir Panjang, Pulau Betong, the tiny island of Pulau Tikus, Tanjung Tokong and many other fishing spots. No one was allowed to talk, especially at night. And we would be lost in our own thoughts, with the wind caressing our faces, the taste of the salty air on our lips and by the time we went home, we had tousled hair that made us look as if we had a rumble and tumble WWF style. While the others went home with all kinds of catfish and different species, I never ever caught one in my life. Strange. One day, one fine day, I will catch one fish...My friends used to laugh at me but that never stopped me from going along with them...

In my younger days, my motto was "Have bike will travel." I have cycled around Pulau Pangkor - and it took me a good four hours on an old mini-bike and have gone round Penang on my motorcycle. Ironically, I will not ride another motorcycle ever again in my life - not in this traffic. Even when I was in Phuket and Hanoi, I refused to rent a bike to go around. I cannot imagine how I went all around town with my bicycle or even walked to wherever. And now - what do I do? Sit at home and blog :-).

Yet, kids today are so much more privileged as they enjoy a wider variety of food, international restaurants and nicer shopping malls. In the past, all we had in Penang was Oriental Emporium just beside Capitol cinema, one supermarket at Chowrasta supermarket and shopping meant going to Chinatown at Campbell Street or the Bazaar at Penang Road. So what do we have in modern Penang? The different shopping complexes that seem to preach and breed materialism seem to distract many Penangites from the beauty and wonder of this lovely island.

Somehow, with progress, I feel quite sad that Penang has lost much of its character as we inch forward to attain progress and development. Gone are the days when we enjoyed slurping ice-balls and eating ice-kacang by the roadside. Now, kids go to Coffee Bean while older ones like me prefer Starbucks and Dome. In the past, it would be a visit to Kek Seng along Penang Road to enjoy the special ice-kacang with the jelly, and heaps of corn and kidney beans and home-made durian ice-cream. Hmm..

And what do young people do these days? They go to Netcity, Infinity etc to play DOTA and other MMOG (multi-media online games) and such progress has completely changed the way we interact with each other, even the thinking faculties of young people as their minds are dulled with all the violence and game strategies. (I hope Shinelight can kindly comment on this :-) if she reads this...)

How often do I hear of young people going canoeing? None.

In my younger days, weekends would be spent at the beach. Fishing, canoeing or hiking. Much slimmer and fitter, I was also very tanned and brown. Sadly, now I dread going out in the sun for fear of pigmentation!!! LOL!

My friends and I would canoe to Pulau Tikus, spend the afternoon there climbing around, knocking oysters off the rocks, rinsing it in the sea water and then eating it there and then. Now, I WOULD NEVER do such a thing for fear of the high E-Coli bacteria content in the sea water!!! Of course, we had lots of fights if I did not row in rhythm with my partner. I had never tried a single-seater in my life for fear that I could not escape in the event it turned turtle and I will never get a chance to do that again in my life...

Ah - on a cloudy day in May, when I feel so languid and listless, what else is there to do but to recall my younger days...Sigh- time has passed me by...but as I reflect on my many experiences, I know I am richer because of the myriad of experiences I have gone through - the joys, the disappointments and the accomplishments etc...all of which have made me who I am.

As I sit here, looking out of my kitchen window and watch the fluffy clouds go by, I am just so glad to be alive and to be able to do the things I love...How about you?

Have a nice day! May you have wonderful moments of recollections or new experiences that will make this day and everyday unforgettable!