masterwordsmith-unplugged

Yesterday was a day of reconnections...I spent the whole afternoon at the opening ceremony of my friends' new cafe called HOME'S CAFE in Bayan Lepas. The quaint place is owned by Mr. & Mrs TG Yeoh(formerly fr Northern Telecoms & Jabil), Mr. & Mrs Alfred Beh, Mr. & Mrs Sam, Im and her husband.

Guan & Suan are the closest friends we have in church and they have been with us through thick and thin for the past 12 years of our lives. I have no doubt that with Guan in charge of the kitchen, he will ensure that Home's Cafe will serve nothing but the best because of his expertise, experience and requirements as a former QC Director and love his love for culinary adventures. I will do a review of the place in the near future. In the mean time, we wish them every success and God's richest blessings upon their business.

It was fantastic to see old friends again such as Cheryl and Calvin, Pris and Christopher, Edward & Andrea, William, Heok Hee, Heok Hooi and Phaik Lean, Pastor Kenny & wife, Loo Ghee & Mark plsu their families and we just missed Khoe Ming and Angie when we arrived. I cannot remember when was the last time I saw all of them together - maybe two years ago? Naturally, everyone looked older while the kids seemed to have all blossomed overnight. While enjoying the delectable buffet spread, we reminisced and talked about our plans, observations and hopes for our children and our future.

By the time we left, I headed for Giant Supermarket and then I received a phone call from a former schoolmate, Mei Ling, who reconnected me with another dear friend with whom we had all lost contact for 30 years!!!

How time flies....In the twinkling of an eye, more than a decade had passed us by...and we are now moving towards middle age years.

Just before I went to sleep, I checked my mail and dear Mei Ling sent me the following clip which made me laugh and cry at the same time. It is all about timing. In the afternoon, I was telling my friends about how I cannot bear to attend funerals since I experienced three deaths in the family in thirteen months and then this clip came....

I had been asking my hubby how he would feel if one day, I moved to another dimension. We have been married for over 25 years, were in courtship for more than 6 years which means that I have spent more than 31 years of my life with my spouse!!! Frankly, it was not an easy road and I was not an easy person to be with when I was younger. But after all that we have been through together, I know that I would not be able to cope with the pain of losing him. I have told him many times and have prayed that God will take me home first. Of course, hubby says I am selfish because it means that he will have to cope with the grief and he asked me whether I ever considered how he would feel. I was stumped. The point he was trying to make was that it is all up to God when we will leave this earth...but I know that when the time comes and he tells me...see you in heaven dear or whatever he may say, my whole being will not be able to cope with the loss in the event that he goes before I do..

Perhaps some of you may think I am a sentimental old lady ...true...I must be insane writing about this at about midnight (I have scheduled this to be posted at 6 a.m.). Honestly, I know that in the early years of my married life, I used to complain about this and that and whined about how my spouse did not this and that - in other words, I was not the perfect mate but looking for the perfect man!!! Through the years, we sort of adapted ourselves to each other...I became more like him - quietened down A LOT, more reclusive like him, and many other similarities set in and it was this that helped us to stay together for over 31 years despite the challenges we faced. I guess we all move through the different stages of life and mature, become deeper characters and change our perspective to become more realistic rather than idealistic and that is what makes us human...

At my age, I have to admit that I do think of death. What lies beyond death? What will happen to my family and how will they cope? It seems that I am the one who knows where everything is kept and ever so often, I am the walking wikipaulapedia and I worry about how my loved ones will cope if one day I move on....like how Amy left Darren so suddenly...*sigh* but life is not about worrying. It is about loving, living and finding our purpose in life, the meaning of our existence and what on earth we are meant to accomplish before we die...

My dear friend Linda had given me the assignment of writing a eulogy for her and to date, I have yet to comply. Frankly, I don't think I would have the strength to cope if my hubby were to pass on first. Gosh - I cannot even get over the death of my dogs...and am fretting because my hamster is ill and then with this video clip, *sigh* the dam just burst...

I guess we all have to come to grips with life and death one day. I know that the most stressful thing in life (according to many stress indicators) is the death of a spouse but marriage is not about mourning. It is about loving our partner and realizing how imperfections are just perfect because we love and that each will be beautifully imperfect to the other in time to come and we love in spite of, despite.....May you and your loved ones have many many years together just living, loving, sharing, caring.....and radiating that love to those around you ...

Please click on the video clip and be moved by this most unusual eulogy...