Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. The following is from the Canadian Association Of Retired People. Thanks to Freddie who shared this with me.
Questions and Answers from CARP Forum
Q: Where can men over the age of 60 find younger, sexy women who are interested
in them?
A: Try a bookstore under fiction.
Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you're done you'll have a place to live.
Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your 60-plus year old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.
Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses.
Q: Seriously! What can I do for these Crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out..
Q: Why should 60-plus year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.
Q: Is it common for 60-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem, Retrieving it is the problem.
Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.
Q: Where should 60-plus year olds look for eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads.
Q: What is the most common remark made by 60-plus year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember these!"
Remember:
Senior Citizens Are Valuable!
We are more valuable than any of the younger generations.
We have silver in our hair.
We have gold in our teeth.
We have stones in our kidneys.
We have lead in our feet and,
We are loaded with natural gas!
SMILE, You've still got your sense of humor, RIGHT?
4 comments to JOKES FOR MONDAY BLUES
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Unknown My dear Cat-in-Sydney,
Sorry for this late response. I was out for lunch with a lovely blog reader from UK.
On my way home, I saw a Persian cat that was lost...wandering around the neighbourhood...I am still wondering if I should go back and bring it home and then to print out flyers about this lost feline friend....So beautiful and with a pink collar too...:-( Am just scared that the owner is somewhere keeping a watchful eye ...and then I might get an earful from him/her..
Life is simple and carefree for most pets - except that they may not have the freedom that they want. But then again, once they have received our love, I doubt they would want to leave.
Once, I cat a merbuk jambul (with licence) for 19 years!!! It would never fly out of its cage even when we left the door wide open!!! As with the demise of my other pets, I wept when it died....
Take care and have a purrrrfect day!
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Zendra-Maria Ooops.... was I going to say something?
Paula: hahahahaha, to borrow from Readers Digest - Laughter is the best medicine!
May your humour be your friend forever.
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Unknown Hi there Kak Zendra
Haha!! Thanks for sharing my humor...May you and your household have laughter in your lives always.
Salam,
Paula
Cat-from-Sydney O Wise Master,
When I grow old, I still wanna be a cat. Life is just uncomplicated....