Sim and I were classmates from Standard 1 to Form 3 and we remained in the same school right till sixth form whilst Michelle and I were classmates from Standard 5 till Upper Six. Sim and I were in the express class and skipped Standard 4 in school and joined Michelle's cohort in Std. 5. So much for history.
Looking back, I am sure many of us had our moments while in school, be it at kindergarten, primary, secondary or at tertiary level. As for me, I think I began fighting against discrimination when I was in Standard 5. So did Michelle.
The Librarian
Back then, we had this skinny librarian who worked full-time in the school library. I think I read practically every single book on the shelves with the exception of sci-fi books. Even though the library was my favorite haunt, there was one thorn in my flesh - the librarian of course!
She would put aside ALL the brand new books including the Nancy Drew & Hardy Boys series for the student librarians. I was outraged and protested on the basis that all were equal regardless of whether one was a student librarian or not. While she justified that the librarians were offering their services to the school and earned the privilege of reading new books first before it was released on the shelves, I argued that since it was a voluntary service, the fact remained that all were students with equal rights, equal opportunities and that one should have access to the books on a first come, first served basis! I was only 9 years old then. My loud protests were brushed aside.
Fuming within, I plotted to take revenge :-(. Very delinquent but then, I am only human!
My third aunt had just arrived from California and gave me a small vial of pepper. I took it to school, the next day with certain intentions. As usual, after school, I headed for the library and went straight to the counter. I asked for the latest books and again, was told that it was to be read by the librarians first! By then, I had poured the pepper onto a handkerchief and rolled it into a ball. Very patiently, I asked the librarian if I could get the books and the same monotonous 'NO" rang through the library.
Gingerly, I took out the handkerchief and threw it at her. The pepper flew into her face and she started sneezing and the others gasped with horror as the librarian began to scream in anger.
I was sent to the Principal's Office and defended myself as I gave my speech on discrimination and unfair treatment given to the others. I am grateful that the Principal then was very understanding, did not punish me but told me why it was wrong. I still remember telling her why what the librarian did was wrong and whether students could enjoy reading those new books at random! With much compassion and understanding, she said she would look into it..and I believe she did.
It was only last night that I discovered that Michelle stormed out of the library on another occasion for the same issue with the librarian and was also sent to the Principal's office. Thankfully, both of us were not punished but given good counselling, otherwise, we might have turned out differently.
The Teacher
It is amazing how one's core values can be formed even from a very young age. I still recall we all fumed when our form teacher used to scold and hit one of our classmates with a wooden ruler and called her "Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!" just because she was slow in maths. Then all of a sudden, she stopped coming to school one day. One of my friends called her home only to discover from her dad that she was suffering from a brain tumor. A few weeks later, she passed away when she did not respond to the treatment as the doctors were too late in diagnosing her condition.
I believe that I developed a very strong dislike for those who intimidate others, even at that young age. Amazingly, we talked about this situation last night when we enjoyed cakes and latte at Summer Garden Restaurant, Vale of Tempe.
In between the serious recollections, we were quite tickled at the recollection of the many silly tricks we played both on teachers and one another. Forty-two years - that is how long we have known each other. Our reunion was filled with many eating sessions as seen in the photos below:
American Capuccino
Carrot cheese cake, Chocolate malt
The Boxer
Our greatest adult fears were probably created by childhood memories. Our greatest adult anxieties (mine would be taking exams!!!!) were produced by childhood memories (as my mom always stressed the need to excel).Our most negative adult views of ourselves are the product of childhood memories (I was called "Fatty" when I was in primary school and I grew up with very low self-esteem).
Once, when the class teacher was recording our weight, this girl ran to the weighing scale, looked at the reading and screamed my weight to the rest of the class. **** is a fatty, fatty bom bom and her weight is ***lbs. I just lost my cool and punched her on the nose and was sent to the Principal's Office again. The following year, I was not allowed to be a prefect even though my friends voted for me!
Yup. I did that. For so long, I had suffered the humiliation of being given names such as "Fiat 128" etc.
Ironically, last night, my friend's son asked us for the identity of the fattest girl in the class. Me of course. And he asked a very pertinent question - Were you deeply affected? Obviously!
Honestly, our most important adult goals have their roots and origins in childhood memories, even our adult drives as well. Our adult attitudes, adult perspectives, adult expectations, and adult view of life are all powerfully influenced by our childhood experiences and memories.
The purpose of this pose is not to wash dirty linen in public or to make a fool of myself or to destroy my reputation. I opened up a small little window to let you take a peek at my inner person because I know that somewhere out there, there could be someone who is like me...hurting in some ways and I hope that in a small way, I can help that person to come to terms and achieve closure on that issue or situation and to move on to a higher and greater plateau in life for more wonderful accomplishments.
If you are a parent who is reading this, make and build beautiful memories with your child, for him or her to be a better person and better parent one day.
Have a lovely evening!!!
Starmandala Hmmm.... you invented pepper spray! Would never have thought... :-)