masterwordsmith-unplugged

Limbo Rock is a popular song written by Kal Mann (under the pseudonym Jake Sheldon) and Billy Strange. An instrumental version was first recorded by The Champs in 1961. The first vocal version was recorded in 1962 by Chubby Checker (on Parkway Records): it reached number two on the Billboard Hot 100 and number one on the Cash Box charts. It was the last of Chubby Checker's career to reach the top ten.

Years ago, this song was used to do the Limbo Rock dance. According to Wikipedia:

Limbo is a dance that originated on the island of Trinidad, though Hawaii is often mistakenly associated with limbo. The dancer moves to a Caribbean rhythm, then leans backward and dances under a horizontal pole without touching it. Upon touching it or falling backwards, the dancer is "out". When several dancers compete, they travel in single file, and the stick is gradually lowered until only one dancer — who has not touched either the pole or the floor — remains.

This evening, I am using the limbo rock dance as an analogy to discuss the pathetic state of affairs in the country with reference to this report in THE STAR on how only a stern warning will be given to two Universiti Putra Malaysia (UPM) lecturers for plagiarising materials from the Internet to produce a guide book.

*FAINT*

Only a stern warning!!!! Can you beat that????

When I was lecturing in the American University Transfer Program at a local college, I failed a significant number of students for the English Composition I class when I detected a mere hint of plagiarism in their research papers because right from Day 1, I made it absolutely clear that plagiarism = fail for any assignment. I explained the different forms of plagiarism and also the moral aspects of that academic crime. In those days, we did not have sophisticated programs to detect plagiarism like what we have today.

I remember one girl plagiarised a whole booklet on Stonehenge. It was quite unfortunate for her that I had just returned from a holiday in UK and had visited that place and had bought that particular booklet. In another case, another girl plagiarized a whole paper presented by a State Councillor on tourism in Penang. I have a copy of the book that documented the proceedings of the conference and could recognize it immediately. In both cases, they denied it until I produced my copy of the printed material. The Stonehenge 'girl' failed the class and other courses and left the college whereas the second girl was very repentant and despite that failure, she picked up the pieces, scraped through my class by trying her best in other assignments and went on to a very good university in the east coast of USA. It has been 12 years since that incident and she still keeps in touch with me

Apart from those two cases, there was another boy who toggled his girlfriend's assignment for my Business Communication class. When interviewed, he continued to proclaim his innocence and even had the audacity to point out that the introductions for both assignments were different. He was dumbfounded when I showed him how the paragraphs matched although in different order.

Then in 2004, I failed quite a number of students in my Sociology class because of blatant and blind plagiarism for term papers which carried 30% of the grade. In one case, the whole paper - a critique of Eminem's "Mockingbird" was lifted off the net!!! I knew because I am an Eminem fan and had done loads of research on the meaning and background of the lyrics of his songs. In the end, those culprits graduated a semester later but went on to secure good jobs and some went overseas to complete their degree.

In 1993, I caught three boys copying each other's homework and I could tell which one was the one who did the real homework. All three were punished by the Principal then - they had to paint the school fence.

One of them went to a Japanese university for his first degree and went on to do his masters in Cornell University. This was the one who actually did the homework. The other went to another American university and runs his own business and the third one went on to an Australian university. I still keep in touch with them.

The point that I am trying to make is this.

I did not compromise on quality or principles with regards to plagiarism and copying. It was a painful decision to make but I did not waver at all in my stand and I am glad I did not. The fact that all but one of them made it in the real world shows that when plagiarism is nibbed in the bud, values are upheld and one's character is groomed in the right direction.

Coming back to the issue, as one who has 'retired', I am absolutely appalled, aghast, horrified and disgusted that the culprits got away with only a slap in their wrists! The steps taken by the authorities do more damage than anything to the already dwindling reputation of our local universities and reflects complete indifference to moral values and the responsibility of an educational institution to uphold academic integrity and excellence.

By just giving a stern warning, what are the authorities teaching other undergraduates, students and the society as a whole? Is this giving people an indirect message that the authorities concerned condone the act because the culprits can get away with it with hardly any strong deterrent to ensure that they or any other Malaysian/student/staff will ever plagiarize again. When social control is not exerted over people who carry out acts that go against the law or morals of a country, then what may be long term and short term effects of such a situation?

Think.

Think hard.

It seems so incredulous to me that while two lecturers - one a professor and another one who had recently received her PhD could carry out such an act and have the audacity to sell their plagiarized works!!!

And it took people SIX years to unravel this case of plagiarism.

WOW!! Talk about moving in slow motion.

Strange isn't it that some authorities just count from one to ten before they take action to zero in on whom they feel have flouted the law.

Let's not forget the Kartika case where the authorities slapped a hefty fine of RM5,000 and public caning for drinking a glass of beer. (You can read my former student's article in The Star HERE on that case. She is currently pursuing her Masters in Journalism in Montreal.)

And what have we here? For heaven's sake, just a STERN WARNING for plagiarism.

I can almost hear students giggling and saying, "Ooooo I am so scared!!! Scold me for plagiarizing!"

According to Wikipedia over HERE,

Here is a list of things that nearly all guys wished that their wives or girlfriends knew ... far too true, and very funny!

* If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.
* Learn to work the toilet seat, if it is up, put it down.
* Don’t cut your hair. Never. Ever.
* Sometimes we’re not thinking about you. Live with it.
* Get rid of your cat.(oops many apologies to cat-lovers, especially Cat-in-Sydney)
* Anything you wear is fine. Really.
* Women wearing Wonder bras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about being stared at.
* You have too many shoes.
* Crying is blackmail.



* Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don’t work.
* Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
* Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
* A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
* Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
* If you don’t dress like the Victoria’s Secret girls, don’t expect us to act like soap opera guys.
* If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we probably meant the other one.
* Let us ogle. If we don’t look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?
* Don’t rub the lamp if you don’t want the genie to come out.
* You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done - not both.
* Christopher Columbus didn’t need directions, and neither do we.
* You have enough clothes.

Have you ever been hurt by another person in your life? Have you ever suffered because of a thoughtless remark, rumours or fabrications of truth or the agony of infidelity or betrayal? If you have, then you know what it feels like to be hurt. We are only human and it is natural and most tempting to hold on to such negative feelings and to build a veneer of hardness around yourself to protect yourself from other such incidents that could inflict more hurts and pain. However, the best way to heal is to forgive the person who hurt us, no matter how difficult. For some, it may take years whereas it may be quite easy for others.

Many religions teach us to forgive. And why so? When we forgive others, I believe that it simply means that we consciously decide not to let their actions or words affect us negatively. In other words, we do not allow ourselves to feel anger, pain, bitterness, or resentment. Conversely, if we choose not to forgive, it then means that we are consciously or unconsciously making a decision to hold on to our feelings of resentment, anger, and pain.

Sometimes one wonders why one should forgive - especially when one is not at fault. If we regard forgiveness as a benefit that we allow ourselves to enjoy because it frees us from anger and allows us to restore close and satisfying relationships with others, then it is not a real chore.

Research has shown that many patients with all kinds of ailments or diseases actually suffer from deep unforgiveness that have been developed from different experiences in their lives. Anger is a potently lethal emotion that comes from being hurt. If we are filled with anger and bitterness, we are hurting inside as much as it hurts the person who has harmed us. It is as if we are filled with some toxic element which can devour us from within if they are not dealt with in the right manner so we can either choose to feed those negative and deadly feelings or to forgive the person who harmed us. Actually, when we choose not to forgive, we are hurting ourselves the most because the pain gnaws us and plagues us in many ways.

We are not saints on this earth. I have to admit it is not easy to forgive. It took me years to forgive my mother for dying when I was 11 years old. I was angry because I did not have her with me when I went through my teenage angst. I was hurting when my mother was not there when I got married. I was broken-hearted when I had my kids and she was not there to see her grandchildren. The pain of losing her was and still is very deep and even as I type this, I still miss her and am very misty-eyed.

When we choose to forgive, we must realize that it does not mean we will never again feel the pain or remember the thing that hurt us. The emotionally painful experience is remembered. At the same time, when we decide to forgive, we are not suppressing these feelings of anger, rather, we are acknowledging those feelings and then learning from those experiences while letting go of whatever or whoever hurt us.

We are also not celestial beings and have no right to moralize as to who is right or wrong in a case. I believe we need to recognize our personal responsibility in each situation and to know that when we forgive, it is not that we are closing one eye to a person's act/words or giving that person the license to persist in that form of behavior. Rather, it means we do not want to be bound by that situation and we free ourselves from it and do not allow that person/s to have a hold over our lives be it in the form of fear or resentment. In forgiving, it is also up to us whether we choose to continue the relationship or to keep our distance. The choice is ours.

Sometimes, it pays if we are honest with ourselves. If we are hurt, angry or unhappy, just admit it!

Suppressing such feelings can cause other problems in the future, including a build-up of negative feelings.

To be honest, I do have a fiery temper and may hurt others with my words when I lash out. Older and wiser, I have learnt to and try to control what I say to be sure that I do not hurt others. Thus, the old advice to take deep breaths when one is angry is really most helpful in challenging situations.

Empathy helps a lot. Seeing the situation from the other person’s point of view can help us develop compassion instead of anger. Guess what? I learnt this from my older son. Once, in an argument, he told me, "Mom, you've been telling me how you feel but have you given any thought to how I feel?" I was stunned. Looking back, I wish I had been more patient with him and know that it was not easy to have me for a mother. I don't make the same mistakes with my younger one and my older boy always says that he is the guinea pig of my parenting experiment and his younger brother is enjoying the lessons I learnt.

Yup, my boy and I went through a difficult journey to discover ourselves, to love each other and most importantly, to forgive one another. In my recovery stage, I spent many moments thinking about the ways in which I had erred and had to consciously decide not to blame myself but to forgive myself for the pain I inflicted on my son. Today, he and I have a very beautiful relationship which I treasure very much. I try not to look back at the past which was filled with hurts. Sometimes, I still do and then I am filled with regret. When that happens, I have to steer myself out of the abyss of regret into the road to the future and to be thankful for the many years ahead that I can share with my older boy. In fact, he always reminds me to leave the past behind.

There have been times when I tried to understand why it is so easy to hurt the people we love. We must also realize that our loved ones may not know why too. At this point of writing this post, I remember "Hurting Each Other" by Carpenters.

Can't we stop hurting each other

Gotta stop hurting each other

Making each other cry

Breaking each other's heart

Tearing each other apart

That is why it has to begin with us. When one party forgives, chances are the other party will acquiesce and there will be healing in the relationship. If they do not react positively, it does not matter. What matters is that we forgive that person and also we forgive ourselves.

I am not going to sermonize as to how to forgive, what to do. I am still learning but in this post, I just want to share my thoughts with you, dear reader, from the bottom of my heart....

From my experience, it is only when we have let go of the pain and released ourselves from past hurts that we can feel a greater sense of freedom and well-being. Then only can we be free to move on in life without bitterness and resentment. We would have left the hurts and our past behind and would be able to look forward with expectancy.

Have a great day!