As a father of 4 daughters, I appreciate this! Laughed out loud reading the final paragraph, hope you will too!
Full Name (first, middle, last) __________________________________
Date of Birth __/___/___ Height_____ Weight_____ IQ_____ GPA______
Social Security #____-____-____ Driver's License #_________________
Boy Scout Rank________________
Home Address (city, state, zip)_________________________________apt. # _______
Do you have one MALE and one FEMALE parent in the home? (y/n))_____
If no, please explain:____________________________
______________________________________
Do you own:
A van? (y/n)____
Truck w/oversized tires? (y/n) _____
Waterbed? (y/n)____
Do you have an earring, nose ring, nipple ring, belly button ring, tattoo? (circle all that apply)
In 50 words or less...
What does the word "LATE" mean to you?___________ ______________________________________________________________
In at least 25 words...What do the words, " Don't touch my daughter mean to you" ? _______________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________
In at least 25 words...What does the word "ABSTINENCE" mean to you? _______________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________
Feel free to use back of page or attach additional sheets for above questions.
Church you attend:____________________
How often?_________________
When would be the best time to interview your father, mother, and priest or other religious education provider?____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________
Answer the following freely and completely honestly. All Answers are Confidential (that means I will not tell anyone --ever -- really! I promise! )
1. If I were shot, the last place on my body I would want to be wounded is____________________.
2. If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my____________.
3. A woman's place is_______________________________.
4. The "one" thing I hope this application doesn't ask me about is ____________________ _________________________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________________________.
5. When I meet a girl, the first thing I notice about her is_____________.*
* Note...if the answer to this question begins with T or A Discontinue at this point and leave the premises! Keeping your head low and running in a serpentine fashion is advised.
6. What do you want to be IF you grow up?
I swear that all information supplied above is true and correct to the best of my knowledge, under penalty of death, a severe beating, dismemberment, torture, crucifixion, electrocution. Any penalty will be decided at the whim of the father.
Signature ________________________________ Date ________
Witness ________________________________ Date ________
Character Reference ________________________________ Date ________
Notarized ________________________________ Date ________
Note: This application will be considered incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, copy of birth certificate, job history, lineage, and a current medical report from your doctor.
Please allow four (4) to six (6) years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Do not call or write as this will only delay the procedure and possibly cause you undue anxiety, if not a visit from the Terminator. If your application is rejected, you will be notified in person by two well dressed gentlemen with violin cases. Do not turn your back on them.
Thank you for your interest!
Have a NICE DAY!
*This post was taken from THIS LINK.
From the time we could go to nursery or pre-school, I am sure many of us realize how nice it is to have a true friend beside us but we of course have to learn how to be a true friend to others. Reciprocation is the key!
Let's face it. Friends who are true and real have the capacity and power to double our happiness and divide our burdens. Basically, our expectations of a true real friend must match the way we treat our friends. Vital characteristics include trust, forgiveness and accountability. And you know what? It is so difficult to find and keep true friendships. Worse of all is the fact that life is short and we don't have that much time on earth. Thus, what we should do is to treasure our friends. If you don't have any true friend yet, then I would encourage you to continue to search for them, because once you have them, life becomes so much easier to live,more beautiful, no matter what happens. Honestly, having gone through pretty rough patches, I can safely say that without my friends, I would not have made it.
But wait a minute! We need to realize that friendships need lots of energy, time and patience to maintain them. It is often so easy to turn a deaf ear to the pleas of our friends when they need us, especially when things are not going too well on our side. It is especially during such times, that we must find the strength from within to help our friend. And it is during these times that the friendship will be forged and strengthened.
Don't forget to be happy for their successes, even when things are not going too well for us. Although it might be hard to do for some people, we need to put others above ourselves and it is made easier when we think about all the sacrifices our friends have made for us and all the times when they were happy for us despite his or her own troubles.
Think about all the happy times you all enjoyed and the sad, rough times you all went through together. That should give you sufficient patience to actually be a true friend for them. Remember, true friends are the next best thing to family. They will always be your pillar of support no matter what. Always. So as you begin a new week, tell me - Can you be a true and real friend?
I am sure you can!
God bless you and have a lovely week!
It has been a long time since I sang. Too long. The last time being in mid-November last year after which I never sang again. Strange how an event can rob me of what I used to love so much. I have not touched my piano or my guitar since that fateful day. In the last eleven months, I think I only touched my piano once when my older boy came back and we jammed a few jazz pieces. But I will sing again...and I will compose music again like I used to...I will...only time can heal...
It's past midnight and I'm feeling blue. Real blue. My dad's second death anniversary is in a couple of days and my stepmom's first death anniversary is tomorrow. I have issues with death. I really do. My mom has been gone for over 37 years and I still miss her so painfully. Coping with loss is most certainly not my forte. How can one go on living normally when there is an empty void that cannot be filled by anyone because the ones we love are gone? Cope. Yup. We have to. But is it easy?
Earlier this evening, while watching my favorites in my youtube channel, I thought of singing again and I did. Since I am a Carpenters fan, it was only natural that I started singing Rainy Days and Mondays because that is exactly how I feel now. Have you ever felt sad? I mean like real sad? Like part of you has been plucked right out of you with no anaesthetic and you are bleeding profusely inside out till you can see your insides and everything seems to become a blur in the aching pain?
Well - that is exactly how I feel now. In the still of the night, while everyone else is in slumberland, here I am spilling my guts because I have no more tears tonight. I did not sleep last night from 2.30 a.m till now. And I am not sure if I can sleep as the whole rigmarole of closing my eyes reminds me of death and my thoughts return again to my dad...the sense of loss, grief, deep sorrow that no balm can heal...and I also lost something else that is so precious to me.
Isn't it funny how we never realize how something or someone means so much to us until we lose it/them? It is so easy to take someone for granted and to go about with our routine until we are blinded by duties and work.
The road to recovery is never an easy one in any circumstance. By the time I recover from the two death anniversaries, it will be November and by mid-November, I will probably (hopefully not though) be swept away by the tsunami feelings as the recollection of it all may overwhelm me. I cannot drive past Esplanade without feeling the lumps in my throat and the goosebumps on my hand. Sighs. But move on, I must and I will.
I recorded this with my Kodak M1033 with no rehearsal in one take. It's very amateurish and I am totally unhappy with it but heck - life is about spontaneity. So what if there are off notes here and there....this is me and I am posting it in the middle of the night cos no one will see it...at least I hope. Gosh - it took almost 2 hours to upload the clip to youtube - a real test of patience indeed. More importantly, I know my voice reflects the deep grief rising from within me. Sighs.
Life - death - birth....the cycle of life...Here's masterwordsmith unplugged with Rainy Days and Mondays.
