Whenever a man has something to say, you can be sure a woman always has to have her say in the end. There have been times in my life where I end up laughing halfway during an argument and then all's well that ends well...Here's a selection of hypothetical exchanges between a man and his woman which might ring familiar to you :-). Have a good laugh and cherish those moments with your wife or loved ones.
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He said... Want a quickie?
She said... As opposed to what?
He said... I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said... You wear briefs, don't you?
He said... Do you love me just because my father left me a fortune?
She said... Not at all honey, I would love you no matter who left you the money.
He said... This coffee isn't fit for a pig!
She said... No problem, I'll get you some that is.
She said... What do you mean by coming home half drunk?
He said... It's not my fault...I ran out of money.
He said... Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you in the worst way.
She said... Well, you succeeded.
Priest... I don't think you will ever find another man like your late husband.
She said... Who's gonna look?
He said... You have a flat chest and need to shave your legs, have you ever been mistaken for a man?
She said... No, have you?
He said... Why do you women always try to impress us with your looks, not with your brains?
She said... Because there is a bigger chance that a man is a moron than he is blind.
He said... Let's go out and have some fun tonight.
She said... Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.
He said... Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?
She said... I would, but you're never there.
He said... Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you really badly.
She said... Well, you succeeded.
He said... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said... That's a good idea... You stand by the ironing board, while I sit on the sofa and fart.
He said... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said... Turn sideways and look in the mirror you fat soul.
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Do leave a comment if you wish. I would love to hear from you. Enjoy the weekend and may the Almighty keep you and yours safe and sound.
35 comments to HE SAYS AND THEN SHE SAYS
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Village Boy Happiness doesn't exist in the past or in the future. It exists within our state of life right now, here in the present, as we face the challenges of daily life.
Yes sis, let's cherish the happy moments with our loved ones!
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Unknown Hi Catherine
:-) Yes! That's a cute one haha...hopefully doesn't rile the guys :-)..Great to hear from you again. Hope you had a restful break.
Have a lovely day!
Cheers
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Monyet King LOL...MWS thanks for putting up all these funny stuff. Reading them is a good way to start the day.
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Anonymous "Recipe For a Happy Marriage"
~~ by Daisaku Ikeda ~~
How a husband and wife should be with each other is not a simple matter. Sometimes circumstances conspire in a strange way, so that wealth or an easy life can actually drive a couple apart, whereas what looks like a mountain of problems to an outsider can be the time of greatest happiness that draws the two closer together.
Unlike the kind of trust that wavers depending on the situation, true love, in the deepest sense of a bond between two people, is something that develops in the face of rough seas. But this does not mean that one partner has to always give in to the other, or that the happiness of one can be built on the suffering of the other.
The husband is not the centre of the relationship, nor is the wife. It is not a question of who is the leader or who must take himself or herself a sacrifice for the other's success and happiness.
Just like a song is a marriage of music and lyrics, husband and wife are equal individuals who, at the same time, perform a single melody of life together. What is important, I think, is how beautiful a song these two life partners can create together.
In order to achieve a deep and harmonious relationship, I believe the two most important ingredients are a sense of gratitude and a common goal.
In today's society, perhaps a family could be thought of as an aeroplane. Buffeted by the winds of change, the two co-pilots have the responsibility of assuring safe arrival. The stability of an aeroplane in flight requires clear direction, momentum and constant effort. And a successful flight requires that the co-pilots keep the same destination in sight.
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Anonymous Let's lead a truly happy life and enjoy a successful marriage.
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Kampung Girl All sexual desire must be directed to the spouse and not to a third person, real or imaginary.
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Tak Malu "Ibrahim Ali is like a parasite, hopping from tree to tree to cari makan (make a living). Whichever tree he is on will somehow die and then he will flutter on to the next."
- Wan Rahim Wan Abdullah, PAS MP for Kota Bahru
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Anonymous He said... Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?
She said... I would, but you're never there.
OMG! ???????
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Unknown Dear Village Boy
Very wise words. After suffering three deaths in the family within one year, I cherish moments spent with my loved ones and friends. Life is so short and tomorrow may never come.
It is better to fill our days with laughter, love, happiness and positive energy than to carry negative feelings of resentment, unforgiveness, hatred etc which would only gnaw at our soul and spirit.
May you be blessed today and everyday with wonderful moments with your loved ones and friends.
Take care and have a great weekend!
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Dr Bala
:-) Thanks for the support! Am glad your appreciate my gila humor hehe...Nothing better than laughter to start the day!
Have a lovely weekend with your family.
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Anon @ 8.31 a.m.
Thank you so much for taking the trouble to infuse my blog with the graceful wisdom of Daisaku Ikeda.
That quotation is certainly very sensitively written with much wisdom, elegance and profound truth.
The analogy of the aeroplane is certainly simple and yet effective.
May God bless you for your kindness and may you continue to be an inspiration to those around you.
Keep in touch! Have a great weekend!
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Anon @ 8.56 am
Her ye! Hear ye! Agree :-)!!!
May God bless you with a lifetime of happiness with your spouse and family.
Take care and enjoy the weekend.
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Kampung Girl
How true! It is when we find true love in a real person that life and love is worth living....Yet, singles can be happy too when driven for a specific cause or project.
Take care and God bless you and yours.
Best wishes
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Unknown Dear Tak Malu
Very saddening truth that you have shared here.
May we be spared of such parasites in our lives and nation at large.
Take care and have a great day!
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Anon
Such situations do exist when spouses neglect each other and forget to nurture each other intellectually, emotionally, spiritually and of course, physically.
Take care! Have a great day!
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Anonymous Teoh Beng Hock’s family will have something to celebrate in the Year of the Tiger with the birth.
Good news? Sad news?
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Unknown Dear Anon @ 11.05 a.m.
It is both good news and sad news...Good news because there is the living proof of the love shared between TBH and his wife and his memory will live on in this child. Bad news because of the grim reminder of the tragedy that robbed TBH's loved ones of this baby's father...The tragedy that plucked TBH right out of the lives of his loved ones and friends.
Sighs.
God bless you, Anon @ 11.05 a.m. for remembering TBH, this innocent baby, his loved ones...and for reminding us of what should never be forgotten....
Take care and do keep in touch!
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Anonymous If you are going to fall in love, try to make your relationship one that generates great spiritual creativity, one that is mutually enriching.
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Justice One wonders if there will be justice for Teoh Beng Hock.
Apparently, justice in this Bolehland comes from the barrel of a gun – BN’s gun.
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ahoo He said : I am the head of the house, you just follow my order.
She said : Yes darl, don't ever forget that I am the neck without which you cannot move.
He said : Why can't you have more respect for my parents.
She said : But you have never respected mine.
He shouted : Don't waste my time with your silly make-up as we are already late for the function.
She shouted : What is 15 minutes waiting time in the car when I have to wake up the whole night through cleaning your vomits.
Men are from Mars & Women are from Venus may seems true afterall.
Carry a heart that never hates
Carry a smile that never fades
Carry a touch that never hurts.
Do have a wonderful day !
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Anonymous Carry a friendship that never fails,
Carry a love that never ever breaks.
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Kampung Girl Before you complain about your husband or wife, think of someone who's crying out to God for a companion.
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Kampung Girl When I saw you I fell in love,
and you smiled because you knew.
~ William Shakespeare.
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Anonymous If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I'd be picking roses for a lifetime.
Salam
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jtba " He said... I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said... You wear briefs, don't you? "
and then , he says ,
" yes , and it stirs when
awaken , grows , and stands to
the occasion " ....
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Unknown Dear Anon @ 11.19am
Thank you for breathing such wise words into my blog with your comment. May God bless you with long lasting happiness in an enriched marriage filled with love and fulfiment.
Best wishes
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Unknown Dear Justice @ 11.24 am
Sighs. It is very saddening and my heart goes out to Cher Wei and TBH's family and friends.
Check out my latest post on TBH'S Leagcy.
Take care and have a great weekend.
Best wishes
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Unknown Dear ahoo
Thanks so much for your comment which may ring true for many couples.
Indeed men and women speak different 'languages'.
Take care and may you have love, joy and happiness with your loved ones and friends always.
Keep in touch!
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Anonymous @ 12.17pm
Thanks for your wise advice.
May I just add...
Carry a friendship that never fails,
Carry a love that never ever breaks.
Carry in your heart hope that avails
Show love & kindness with nothing at stake.
Take care and God bless you and yours.
Stay in touch! Have a lovely weekend.
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Unknown Dear Kampung Girl
God bless you for your caring and considerate comment. Take care and have a nice day!
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Kampung Girl
Wow! Thanks for sharing such a romantic line and from the Old Bard too!
Take care and have a great weekend.
Do keep in touch. Lovely to have you share your thoughts and input here.
Cheers
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Unknown Dear Anon @ 12.49pm
Wow!! What a romantic thought! Did you write that???
Thanks for your lovely input. Take care and may you continue to inspire others so beautifully.
Have a lovely rose-filled day!
Salam
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Unknown Dear JTBA
Wow!! I did not know you can be so cheeky haha!
Thanks for sharing...:-)
Take care and have a great day.
Salam
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Anonymous A couple from distant land went to Jeruselem . The nagging bini died suddenly BUT the man refused to bury her there .
He said :" 2000 years ago someone died & got buried there BUT 3 days
later he lived again ! I dun want to take a risk ! " (copycat)
Catherine He said... I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said... You wear briefs, don't you?
Well, that's a nice one!
Have a nice day