masterwordsmith-unplugged

How do crazy people go through the forest? - They take the psycho path.

-Author Unknown-

How can you make holy water at home? - You boil the hell out of it.

What do fish say when they hit a concrete wall? - Dam!

What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? - Polaroids

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? - A stick.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? - - Nacho cheese.

What do you call Santa's helpers? - Subordinate clauses.

What do you call four bullfighters in quicksand? - Quatro sinko.

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? - Frostbite.

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? - A nervous wreck.

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? - Anyone can roast beef.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? - Right where you left him.

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? - Because they have big fingers.

Why don't blind people like to sky dive? - Because it scares the heck out of the dog.

What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic? - Sanka.

What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover? - The location of the dirt bag.

Why do a pilgrim's pants always fall down? - Because they wear their belt buckle on their hat.

What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver? - A bad golfer goes, whack, "darn." - A bad skydiver goes "darn," whack.

How do you catch a unique rabbit? - Unique up on it.

How do you catch a tame rabbit? - Tame way, unique up on it.

What do you call skydiving lawyers? - Skeet.

What goes clop, clop, clop, bang, bang, clop, clop, clop? - An Amish drive-by shooting.

-Author Unknown - a compilation from here and there-