Grandparent's Answering Machine

Posted by Unknown On Monday, June 6, 2011 2 comments
Good morning .... At present we are not at home, but please leave your message after you hear the beep.


beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeppp ...

If you are one of our children, dial 1 and then select the option from 1 to 5 in order of "arrival" so we know who it is.

If you need us to stay with the children, press 2/

If you want to borrow the car, press 3.

If you want us to wash your clothes and ironing, press 4.

If you want the grandchildren to sleep here tonight, press 5.

If you want us to pick up the kids at school, press 6.

If you want us to prepare a meal for Sunday or to have it delivered to your home, press 7.

If you want to come to eat here, press 8.

If you need money, dial 9.

If you are going to invite us to dinner, or taking us to the theater, start talking ... we are listening !!!!!!!!!!!" 

-Author Unknown-

*Thanks to Angela who sent me this post.
Labels:

2 comments to Grandparent's Answering Machine

  1. says:
    June 6, 2011 at 6:44 PM

    TO Mental Health Helpline
    Cut/ Copy and Paste to your browser:-
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZY2qP20-W80

  1. says:
    June 6, 2011 at 6:46 PM

    TO This is the transcript of the new answering service recently installed at the Mental Health Institute.

    Hello and welcome to the Mental Health Hotline.

    If you are obsessive-compulsive: Press 1 repeatedly.
    If you are co-dependent: Ask someone to press 2 for you.
    If you have multiple personalities: Press 3, 4, 5 and 6.
    If you are paranoid: We know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
    If you are delusional: Press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.
    If you are schizophrenic: Listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
    If you are manic-depressive: It doesn't matter what number you press - no-one will answer.
    If you are dyslexic: Press 969696969696969696.
    If you have a nervous disorder: Please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on the line.
    If you have amnesia: Press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name.
    If you have short-term memory loss: Press 9.
    If you have short-term memory loss: Press 9.
    If you have short-term memory loss: Press 9. If you have short term memory loss: Press 9.
    If you have low self esteem: Please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.

Post a Comment

Related Posts with Thumbnails
.