masterwordsmith-unplugged

What women say:
How about a movie tonight?
What women really mean:
If I spend one more night between these four walls, I will start frothing at the mouth

What women say:
Whose turn is it to change the baby’s nappy?
What women really mean:
It’s been my turn for the last 6 weeks

What women say:
Phone your mother
What women really mean:
If you don’t then I have to speak to her

What women say:
Nancy’s husband fixed their electronic garage door
What women really mean:
When are you going to fix the washer on the tap and change the lightbulb in the bathroom?

What women say:
Working late again tonight?
What women really mean:
Who is she?

What women say:
Of course I won’t leave you
What women really mean:
The mere fact that you ask means you think I have enough reason to

What women say:
No, I don’t think Bob is more attractive than you are
What women really mean:
I met the two of you together and he wouldn't’t have me

What women say:
Not more than a few pounds
What women really mean:
There are 25 pounds of you to which I am not legally married

What women say:
I really wouldn't’t have noticed if you didn't’t tell me
What women really mean:
I wanted to give you a hair transplant for your birthday

What women say:
Don’t you think it would be a good idea
What women really mean:
I think it would be a good idea

What women say:
I know that you have made an effort
What women really mean:
It is just not enough

What women say:
Do I look fat in this dress?
What women really mean:
Do you still love me?

What women say:
If you had to choose for a second time, would you marry me again?
What women really mean:
Hesitate one second and you are dead

What women say:
Where did you advertise for your new secretary?
What women really mean:
The notice board at the modelling school? Can she type or is that not what
she was hired for?

What women say:
Of course your mom can spend December with us
What women really mean:
My mom is coming for 6 months – would now be a good time to tell you?

What women say:
A surprise - that's what is for supper
What women really mean:
I haven't got the faintest idea - checked the freezer lately?

What women say:
Would you mind looking after the kids for two hours on Tuesday night?
What women really mean:
Actually it will be four hours and I have already made the booking

What women say:
I really love you
What women really mean:
I bumped your car this morning

What women say:
Did I tell you I invited Sandra and Jakes for supper?
What women really mean:
I know I didn'’t tell you, but because you never listen, I thought I might
slip it past you

What women say:
Who has been in the bathroom?
What women really mean:
I know it was you – your underpants are lying in a crumpled heap on the
bathroom floor. What were you doing? Auditioning for Moby Dick?

What women say:
I am so glad I married you
What women really mean:
Look at what Linda ended up with

What women say:
Not this week - I am really busy
What women really mean:
Beat it, creep

What women say:
Don't worry, everyone was a bit out of control
What women really mean:
Can you even remember downing the umpteenth beer with underpants on your head?

What women say:
Do you like my new dress?
What women really mean:
Why haven't you noticed it already?

What women say:
A quickie, now?
What women really mean:
You have the timing of a rhinoceros in mating season - your parents should already have been here.

-Author Unknown-

Thanks to TO who sent me this post.

So the next time your wife asks you any of these questions, you know what to do. :-)
Have a great day!