Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL A HANDSOME INTELLIGENT SENSITIVE MAN?
A: A RUMOR.
Q: What is the different between a girl and a cellphone...
A: You can put a cell phone on silent.
Q: What does a clock do when it's hungry?
A: Goes back 4 seconds!!!
Research shows that 90% of men don't know how to use condom, these people are called DADS....
Did you hear the story about the giraffe?
Forget it - it's too long.
Q: Waiter how long will the chips be?
A: About five centimeters each, I expect sir.
Q: What do you do when you throw a clock up in the air
A: Times up!
Q: What did the dog say when he sat on the sand paper?
A: Ruff.
Q: What do you call a cow with no legs??
A: Ground beef.
Q: What do you call a monkey on a mine field ?
A: a baboon
Q: What do you get if you cross a bee with a skunk?
A: An animal that stinks and stings!
Q : What is the difference between women and magnets ?
A : Magnets have also positive side.
Q:What did one eye say to the other eye?
A:Between you and me something smells.
Q. What's the difference between an aerobics instructor and a dentist?
A. A dentist lets you sit down while he hurts you.
Q: Whats long, hard, and full of seamen?
A: A submarine.
Q. An ethical lawyer, an honest politician, and a merciful aerobics instructor all fall out of an airplane. Which one hits the ground first?
A. It doesn't matter - none of them exist.
2 comments to Funny One-Liners
-
Unknown Dear Nick
I truly enjoyed your witty and hilarious input, dear friend. My deepest apologies for this late response. I am older now and terribly forgetful! Take care and have a great day!
Cheers
nick Sis,
What's long, hard and full of seamen and goes "are we in yet?" A Malaysian Submarine.
What do you get if you cross a frog and a politician? It's not an animal and it's NOT a human but it still manages to piss you off!
What do you call an idiot with a ring? No matter what you call her, she won't understand!
What do you call a PM's wife with a RM24million ring? Prime Minister.
What do you call a PM whose wife has a RM24million ring? Prime Minister too but not in front of his wife!
What do you get if you cross a MB with a dentist? Don't, it's a stupid idea.
What's the difference between TNB and IPP? One always listens to the govt and the other, the govt is the one doing the listening.
Nick.
have a great weekend Sis and GOD Bless!