masterwordsmith-unplugged

I cried buckets today. I really did. Even when writing this, I am holding back the tears. Today, I received news that my girlfriend, who recently discovered she has Stage 4B duodenum cancer, is now suffering from kidney failure. :-(

Just last Monday, her three children whom I had taught for many years, came to visit me together with their aunt. Then, we discussed the possible steps to take in case her condition deteriorated. That morning, my friend could no longer stand or walk and needed wheelchair support.

I cannot believe that in a matter of seven days, things have taken a turn for the worst. I could never understand why my dad was so upset when one of his cohorts passed on. Now I do. I have, of late, come face to face with my own mortality.

The past week, I have been chatting as usual with Angela via Skype and with my girlfriend Linda who hails from Singapore via Facebook chat.

I told both of them that I would be devastated if they died before I did. We all concurred that in the event that one of us died, we would not attend the other's funeral. It would just be too heartbreaking.

Linda and I have been taking turns to cry. That is good. Cos if we both cried at the same time, who would console us? Our husbands already think we are both mad. :-(

Last night, it was Linda who was feeling upset and I tried to lift up her spirits. And this afternoon, it was my turn and like the angel she was born to be, she tried to cheer me up with the most bizarre statements such as "Go talk to your IT guy." :-)

Somehow, the thought of our dear friend succumbing to the big C is just too much for us. We had both seen the kids grow up, gone through good and bad times together and had been there for one another throughout the past 18 years or so.

It is so heartbreaking.

:-(

But I am glad the pastor went to visit her in the High Dependency Unit this afternoon. I pray that she will not have to go through pain and that there can be, God willing, a miraculous recovery!

I am sure everyone of you out there had to go through the pain of losing someone.

It hurts.

It really does.

I took seven months to recover from my dad's demise and decades to get over my mom's death.

More than ever before, I have come to value every second of my life and my loved ones.

I cannot imagine my life without my loved ones. And weak as I am, I really hope I will be the first to go.

To carry on living without the one/s we love so much is, to me, MOST unbearable.

:-(

So my dear readers, take time to tell your loved ones how much they mean to you...

Just in case tomorrow never comes....

Take care and have a restful evening.

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