masterwordsmith-unplugged

How many altos does it take to change a light bulb? None. They can't get up that high.

What is the definition of an octave? An octave can be described as having eight diatonic steps, twelve chromatic steps, or twenty-seven when sung by a tenor.

What is the missing link between the bass and the ape? The baritone.

What is the difference between a Wagnerian soprano and a Wagnerian Tenor? About 10 pounds.

How many sopranos does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one; she just holds it in place, and the whole world revolves around her.

How many sopranos does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One to change it and one to watch and say, "Don't you think that's a bit high for you, dear?"

How many sopranos does it take to change a lightbulb? None; she thinks it's the accompanist's job.

How many basses does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They're so macho they prefer to walk in the dark and bang their shins.

Why do school choruses travel so often? Keeps assassins guessing.

What's the difference between a soprano and a Jaguar? Most musicians have never been in a Jaguar.

Why is the soprano standing outside the door? She forgot the key.

What is the difference between a dressmaker and a soprano? The dressmaker tucks up the frills.

How many altos does it take to change a lightbulb? None, because they cannot reach it.

What's the difference between an alto and a tenor? More body hair on the alto.

How do you know that it's the lead singer knocking at your front door? You open the door and he still doesn't know when to come in.

What's the first thing that a female singer does after she gets up in the morning? 1. Puts on her clothes and goes home. 2. Looks for her instrument.

What does a girls band vocalist's mother say to her before she goes out? If you are not in bed by 12pm you have to come home.

What´s the difference between a female lead singer and a terrorist? You can negotiate with a terrorist.

What is the difference between a soprano and a pirhana? The lipstick.

What is the difference between a soprano and a pit bull terrier? The jewelry.

What is the definition of an alto? A soprano who can read.


-Author Unknown-

How do you put a sparkle in a soprano's eyes? Shine a torch in her ear.