masterwordsmith-unplugged

Star Trek Virus: Invades your system and boldly goes where no virus has gone before.

Ross Perot Virus: Activates every component on your system, just before the whole thing quits.

Mario Cuomo Virus: It would be a great virus, but it refuses to run.

Dan Quayle Virus: Their is sumthing rong with yor compueter, ewe just can't figyour out watt.

Monica Lewinsky Virus: Sucks all the memory out of your computer.

Lorena Bobbit virus: Turns your hard disk into a 3.5 inch floppy.

Ellen Degeneres virus: Your IBM suddenly claims it's a MAC.

Disney virus: Everything in the computer goes Goofy.

Titanic virus: Makes your whole computer go down.

Prozac virus: Screws up your RAM but your processor doesn't care.

Joey Buttafuoco virus: Only attacks minor files.

Spice Girl virus: Has no real function, but makes a pretty desktop.

Ronald Reagan virus: Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored.

Dr. Kevorkian virus: Searches your hard drive for old files and deletes them.

Viagra virus: Expands your hard drive while putting too much pressure on your zip drive.

Clinton Virus: Reduces your hard drive to 6k, erases its memory, and swears it never infected your system.

Bureaucrat Virus: Divides your hard drive into hundreds of little units, each of which do practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important part of the computer.

Government Economist Virus: Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.

Airline Virus: You're in Chicago but your data is in Singapore.

Gallup Virus: 60% of the PCs infected will lose 38% of their data 14% of the time (plus or minus a 3.5% margin of error.)

Texas Virus: Makes sure it's bigger than any other file.

Warren Beatty Virus: Constantly tries to prove its virility by attaching itself to younger or newer files.

Nike Virus: Just does it.