Warning - New, Dangerous and Hilarious!

Posted by M ws On Saturday, July 27, 2013 0 comments
Thanks to Angela who shared the following fictitious humourous satire which I am posting strictly for laughs. Kudos to whoever wrote this piece! Simply brilliant!

Subject:  New contagious Diseases In Mssia - Be afraid, be very afraid!

The Mesia Ministry of Health is now asking the public to be on the lookout for symptoms of the following new contagious diseases.

ASSMA

Severe rashes around the mouth caused by kissing too much a*s. The number-one disease in Mesia amongst
civil service.

DIAL-ARRHOEA

Uncontrollable urge to continually dial friends on mobile phone to share with them such important
information as 'I'm now on the monorail'or 'I'm walking towards the car.' Victims can be recognized
by large, twitching thumb.

MEESLES

Blotchy skin condition caused by eating too many packets of instant noodles.

MULTIPLE SPOUSOSIS

Affliction whereby victims make frequent trips to Vietnam,Thailand,Indonesia, and China to take on
additional brides. Middle-aged men are at significant risk.

YELLOW FEVER

Compulsion to date Asian females. Very common affliction amongst foreign celebrities and caucasian
expatriates working in Mesia. Also known as Pinkerton's Disease.

EKOR-TOTONUS

Flushed complexion, high blood pressure and sometimes depression at finding out one has not
won any gaming numbers and lotteries.

HEAVYTITIS

Excessively large breasts. This disease comes in several variant strains.... Heavytitis C; Heavytitis D;
Heavytitis DD, and sometimes Heavytitis F...or even G.

CYBERTENSION

Feelings of stress and panic caused by lack of internet access.

DYEBETES

A compulsive need to colour one's hair. Reddish brown tints are the most common symptom, but health
authorities have reported a new strain of blond highlights.

CHICKEN TOX

Victims exhibit a great need to tokkok. Highly contagious. Spread by ordinary conversation, and may be exacerbated by good food and alcohol. Politicians and lawyers are especially susceptible. Incurable.

ITCHINIA

The urge in some men after reaching 40 to go for young chicks. This disease spreads fast among those with money and position and cuts across both government and business people. Beware of those who take trips out under the pretext of duty or business. This is a dangerous symptom that the disease may already have
taken hold.....

LOL!

Have a nice day!

0 comments to Warning - New, Dangerous and Hilarious!

Related Posts with Thumbnails
.