* What do you call a handcuffed man?
Trustworthy
* What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
* Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven?
Because if they all went, it would be Hell.
* Why do men like smart women?
Opposites attract.
* How do men exercise on the beach?
By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
* How do you get a man to stop biting his nails?
Make him wear shoes.
* How does a man show he's planning for the future?
He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
* How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
ONE. He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.
* What did God say after creating man?
I can do so much better.
* What's a man's idea of honesty in a relationship?
Telling you his real name.
* What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups?
Put the remote control between his toes.
* What's the smartest thing a man can say?
"My wife says..."
* Why are all dumb blonde jokes one liners?
So men can understand them.
* Why did God create man before woman?
Because you're always supposed to have a rough draft before creating your masterpiece.
* Why do black widow spiders kill the males after mating?
To stop the snoring before it starts.
* Why do jocks play on artificial turf?
To keep them from grazing.
* Why do men need instant replay on TV sports?
Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.
* Why does it take 100 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
Because not one will stop and ask for directions.
* Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for men than for women?
When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already here.
I put up this post for fun and not to insult anyone :-). Do leave a comment if you wish to share your thoughts or add to the list :-). Thanks! Take care and have a great day!
Monyet King MWS, good morning. Thanks for the laughs. A great way to start the day.