Puns for Fun

Posted by M ws On Tuesday, June 28, 2011 0 comments
A bicycle can't stand on its own because it's two-tired.

What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway)

A backward poet writes inverse.

In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes

A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed.

With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.

Show me a piano falling down on a mine shaft and I'll show you A-flat minor
When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

The man who fell into an upholstery machine? He's fully recovered.

A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart

You feel stuck to your debt if you can't budge it.

Every calendar's days are numbered.

A lot of money is tainted. Taint yours and it taint mine.

A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

He had a photographic memory that was never developed.

A plateau is a high form of flattery.

The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large

Those who are too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

Once you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.

Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.

Bakers trade bread secrets on a knead to know basis.

Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

Acupuncture is a jab well done.

Marathon runners with bad footwear will suffer the agony of defeet.

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