masterwordsmith-unplugged

Disturbed thinking

A woman threatened to call police after claiming that she'd been locked in by staff. In fact, she had mistaken the 'do not disturb' sign on the back of the door as a warning to remain in the room.

What an outrage!

'The beach was too sandy.'

How thick can you be?

A guest at a Novotel in Australia complained his soup was too thick and strong. He was inadvertently slurping the gravy at the time.

Do not distract

'Topless sunbathing on the beach should be banned. The holiday was ruined as my husband spent all day looking at other women.'

Cheap but not cheerful

'We bought designer sunglasses for five euros from a street trader, only to find out they were fake.'

Sea for yourself

'No-one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children were startled.'

Plane madness

'It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England, but it only took the Americans three hours to get home.'

A measured approach

'I compared the size of our one-bedroom apartment to our friends' three-bedroom apartment and ours was significantly smaller.'

Good question!

'The brochure stated: "No hairdressers at the accommodation". We’re trainee hairdressers - will we be OK staying there?'

Too many foreigners

'There are too many Spanish people. The receptionist speaks Spanish. The food is Spanish. Too many foreigners now live abroad.'

Hot and bothered

'We had to queue outside with no air conditioning.'

Unruly ruling

'It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel.'
 
Itching session

'I was bitten by a mosquito. No-one said they could bite.'

Double trouble

'My fiancé and I booked a twin-bedded room but we were placed in a double-bedded room. We now hold you responsible for the fact that I find myself pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked.

-Authot Unknown-

*Posted for laughs with no intention to offend anyone. Thanks to Freddie who sent me this list. Have a fantastic Sunday, everyone!