Here We Go Again...

Posted by M ws On Saturday, September 22, 2012 4 comments
 I have not been able to update my blog till now because I have been ill again. It has been very stressful since August because of issues with my computers.

To cut the long story short, every week (sometimes twice a week), I have had to send my babies for repair. Now, I have no computers to do blogging. It is most frustrating because in the four years of blogging, I never earned a single cent and have spent a lot.

Some readers offered to give donations but to date, I have never accepted a single cent from anyone. I do not host advertisements in my blog because I do not want to spoil the design. Hence, instead of earning from blogging, my resources have been drained.

At my age when savings are dwindling with rising cost of living, buying a new computer to do blogging is totally out of the question. To me, the $$$ is better used to pay for my medical bills. I do not have extra money to buy another computer. Realistically, I am actually quite sick of IT. Fortunately, I have scheduled lots of posts in advance for the 6.30am post each day so there will still be posts everyday. 

My friend Linda has offered to buy me a typewriter so that I can type letters to her and go back to the good old days of using paper, envelopes and licking stamps. With all that has happened, the bizarre trail of events, the sense of worry, anxiety has had its toll on my health.

Today has been especially bad. My gastric problem which resurfaced last week was in its element today - belching, vomiting, farting, giddiness, migraine etc etc. I am so weak that even going up one flight of stairs leaves me panting and dizzy. My doctor's eyes popped out in shock and horror when he saw the reading for my blood pressure - well so did mine. For once, drawing blood did not make me wince because I was still reeling from the shock of the high blood pressure reading. So I have to wait till Tuesday for the results of the blood test.

He did tell me the possibilities of my condition and that made me feel worse. :-(

I looked at myself in the mirror earlier and asked myself - is it worth it? The answer is 'NO'. All the stress, anxiety, fear etc - negative energy that was communicated to my body, mind, spirit and soul. :-(

Yesterday, and even today, Linda told me via whatsapp to throw away my computers. And I told her haha - I have none to throw.

My apologies to readers and friends as I may be late in publishing comments and even slower in responding to emails.

Anyway, here is something Kak Fawziah sent me via email which resonates deeply with me. Take care and God bless.

____________________

  *Sixty and Going Strong*
(Translated from the original in Chinese below)
*“There are 1000-year old trees in the mountain, but not many 100 year-old people”*
*At the most, you live until 100 years old (only 1 in 100,000).*
*If you live until 90, you only have 10 years.*
*If you live until 80, you only have 20 years.*
*Because you don’t have many years to live, and you can’t bring along
things when you go, you don’t have to be too thrifty. *
*Spend the money that should be spent, enjoy what should be enjoyed,
donate what you are able to donate, but don’t leave **all  to your children
or grandchildren, for you don’t want them to become “parasites”.*
*Don’t worry about what will happen after you are gone, because when you
return to dust,  you will feel nothing about praises or criticisms.*
*Don’t worry too much about your children for “children will have their
own destiny and find their own way. Don’t be your children’s slave”*
*Don’t expect too much from your children. Caring children, though
caring, would be too busy with their jobs and commitments to render any
help.*
*Uncaring children may fight over your assets even when you are still
alive, and wish for your early demise **so they can inherit your properties.
*

          * *
*Your children take for granted that they are rightful heirs to your
wealth; but you have no claims to their money.*

*60-year olds like you, don’t trade in your health for wealth anymore;*
*Because your money may not be able to buy your health.*
* *
*When to stop making money, and how much is enough (hundred thousands,
million, ten million)? “Out of thousand hectares of good farm land, *
*you can only consume three quarts (of rice) daily; out of a thousand of
mansions, you only need eight square meters of space to rest at night”. *
*So as long as you have enough food and enough money to spend, that is
good enough.*
* *
*So you should live happily. Every family has its own problems. Just do
not compare with others for fame and social status and see *
*whose children are doing better, etc. but challenge others for happiness,
health and longevity.*
* *
*Don’t worry about things that you can’t change because it doesn’t help and it may spoil your health.*
* *
*You have to create your own well-being and find your own happiness;*
*As long as you are in good mood, think about happy things, do happy things daily and have fun in doing, then you will pass your time happily every day. *
* *
*One day passes, you will lose one day;*
*One day passes with happiness, and then you gain one day.*
* *
*In good spirit, sickness will cure; in good spirit, sickness will cure fast; in good spirit; sickness will never come.*
*With good mood, suitable amount of exercise, always in the sun, variety of foods, reasonable amount of vitamin *
*and mineral intake, hopefully you will live another 20 or 30 years healthy life.*

-Author Unknown-

4 comments to Here We Go Again...

  1. says:

    stephen Get well soon Paula. Hope the test results will be fine, just a minor health hiccup.
    It's not been great guns for me either as far as health is concerned. One thing after another.
    Anyway, take care and welcome to the fifties and all it's baggage!!

  1. says:

    masterwordsmith Dear Stephen

    Thank you so much for your comforting words. It is great to hear from you again. I am sorry to hear about the challenges you are facing and hope that things will be back to normal for you soon.

    As for me, the doctor thinks it could be something serious. The year 2012 has not been good as I have had one medical problem after another. Indeed, this is life in the 50's. I have lost so much weight that it is scary to look at myself in the mirror! For once in my life, I can say I look thin.

    All I want now is to be healthy and happy. It is tough to be happy when one is not ok.

    In the mean time, take care and may God bless you and your loved ones always.

    Thanks again for reaching out. I appreciate your kindness and our connection.

    Keep in touch!

    Cheers

  1. says:

    modernlifeisrubbish Dear MWS,

    I don't know what to say but please regain your health soon.

    One of the sentence in this post makes me realize something again. "Don’t worry about things that you can’t change because it doesn’t help and it may spoil your health." Yes, some things we can never change. As someone who believe we can still change things a year ago, i know better now.

    i tell myself the most important things is spending as much time as possible with my loved ones. Things will runs its course in due time.

    So, please get well soon ya. Take care.

  1. says:

    masterwordsmith Dear JWCW

    I am so sorry for this late response. As you know, I am seldom online these days and am also very forgetful. So sometimes, I also forget to respond to comments as when reading comments, I respond mentally and then think I have responded in writing when I haven't!

    Thank you so much for all the goodness and kindness you have breathed into my life. You are indeed a guardian angel and I am blessed to call you friend.

    Truly, the past few weeks have been life-transforming experiences. To come so close to going and then to be given another chance...it is more than i can ask for.

    Everyday, I am thankful i am still alive and every night, I am glad for the day that has passed and pray i can still be up the next morning.

    Take care and thank you for your sincerity and helpfulness and for being there whenever I need your assistance or support.

    You have been such a blessing and I pray God will bless you and your family abundantly!!!

    Warmest regards

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