masterwordsmith-unplugged

You can say what you want about Florida, but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving north. These are actual ads seen in ''The Villages'' a Florida newspaper.
     
(Who says Seniors don't have a sense of humor?)
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       *_FOXY LADY_*
Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's, slim, 5’- 4’’ (used to be 5’ – 6’’), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.
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       *_LONG-TERM COMMITMENT_*
Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband, looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness, Fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.
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       *_SERENITY NOW_*
I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.
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       *_WINNING SMILE_*
Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flossier to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.
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       *_BEATLES OR STONES? _*
I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar. If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let's get together and listen to my eight-track tapes.
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       *_MEMORIES_*
I can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads together.
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       *_MINT CONDITION_*
Male, 1932 model, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in running condition, but walks well.