masterwordsmith-unplugged

It seems like not too long ago when I walked down the aisle in my white gown, long trailing veil, to exchange vows and thereafter changed my marital status.

Reality check. Twenty-five years. That is how long I have been married. Wow! We survived. Actually, it has been longer than that if I were to include the 6 years 4 months 2 weeks of courtship. Yea! That long.

My husband and I took dancing lessons years ago and it was not easy for us to move in sync with each other. Until today, I remember the significance of the difficulties we encountered in our Latin American and Ballroom Dancing classes. To me, a good relationship or marriage has a pattern like a dance and is built on some of the same rules.

The partners do not need to hold on tightly, because they move confidently in the same pattern, intricate, complicated sometimes, but gaily and freely be it a waltz, tango, quickstep and so on…maybe I should say salsa, hip-hop etc.

To touch heavily would be to arrest or retard the pattern and freeze the movement, to check the endlessly changing beauty of how the dance unfolds.

Think about it where relationships are concerned. Am I hitting any relevant notes?

There is no place for the possessive clutch, the clinging arm, the heavy hand…only the lightest touch in passing. Nonetheless, without being sexist, for girls, it is quite difficult for some not to be possessive. I suppose that is due to insecurity or their inborn mothering instinct …

Nagging, condemning, complaining and other negative comments when the dancing partner misses a step or a turn would exacerbate matters. When a partner falters, falls, fails to live up to expectations, what should be our correct response?

To condemn or to encourage? To attack or to support? To defend or to comply? Such difficult questions with even more difficult responses. To me, tolerance, forbearance and most of all, patience would save the day.

Having said that, when arm in arm , face to face or even back to back depending on what type of dance, it does not matter IF and WHEN a couple becomes partners moving to the same groove or rhythm, creating a pattern, a lifestyle, a beautiful dance, a fulfilling life, and being invisibly nourished by it.

Do you jive, quickstep, salsa or are you in a strife?

Here's wishing you a wonderful lifetime of loving and sharing with your spouse/partner and if you have not found one yet, may you find one in time, and if your choice is singlehood - may you always be happy and fulfilled.

God bless you and yours and have a lovely weekend!!!

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