With all the madness that is happening around us, it IS difficult to keep sane. I thought of blogging on a different plane of madness this evening so here is a fictitious satirical piece which I hope you will enjoy. Any resemblance to any event, person or place is purely coincidental. Have a good rest!
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Pulau Gila - With random cries of "Enough is enough," "Do something for idiots now," and "Huh? What's Your Problemlah?", hundreds of the state's BIGGEST MORONS descended on Pulau Gila's downtown area two days ago.
The march, which had no discernible goal, had demonstrators carrying banners filled with idiotic messages. The march, which purportedly had no official organizers, began at approximately 8:45 a.m. in front of what the morons called the Seelee Shopping Complex, when they had actually intended to meet at the courtyard outside the State Executive Office.
"More government accountability, and transparency, and accountability!" shouted Class 1-A moron named Why You So Like That Ah?, addressing no one in particular. "On behalf of me, and all the morons who came here today, listen carefully! We're not going anywhere until each and every one of our voices is heard."
Their first stop was at what the morons thought to be the Governor's Residence. They made a big hoo-ha to try and figure out who was their leader when they realized that they had none because they had been paid to do what they were doing. So, the protestors marched east on Durian Avenue, south along Cempedak Street, paused in another state of confusion when they realized they had forgotten their original destination and then after much discussion and voting, they found their way back to Seelee Shopping Complex to begin their march over again.
The authorities concerned claimed that the gathering was largely peaceful and that a permit had been given for them to assemble by the Department of Do It Your Way. Minutes after they congregated, they started burning their banners and claimed that most of the fires were set accidentally. Demonstrators were visibly angry about many issues of concern including where to sell their food/drinks and many others followed them around as if this were some kind of rally for siblings, friends, neighbours and the whole town.
"Come on out of that precious little claustrophic office of yours, Mr. Mayor. We're right here waiting," Moron Class 2-A nicknamed Your Problem is Not my Problem but My Problem is Your Problem yelled toward the marble-columned State Executive Office. "I didn't come all this way to be ignored. I have a message to give to you!"
Of course no one came out to receive his message because he was screaming in the wrong direction at the wrong facade of the building.
Throughout the day, the number of protesters grew to include not just morons, but more neanderthal idiots, dunderheads, and some the biggest retards known to man simply because they would do the most ridiculous and absurd things all for a pittance.
It is estimated that about 300 simpletons turned up, though dozens were lost while trying to find a place to park, and more were lost after wandering into the nearby Times Park.
"This is—," said Pulau Gila TV's anchorman Pandai Man while broadcasting video footage of protesters shouting "Meet Us! Meet Us!" at the entrance of the State Executive Office. "Actually, I don't know what THIS IS."
Deeply moved by the marchers' plight and lack of neurons in trying to decide for themselves what is real and important in the state, the State Government announced the next day that they will give PG300 000 dollars to completely overhaul the state's education system.
Perhaps by then, morons will no longer march aimlessly in Pulau Gila. Or so they hope.
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Do leave a comment if you would like to share your thoughts. Thanks!
16 comments to MADNESS REIGNS IN PULAU GILA
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Unknown Dear Dr. Bala
Definitely! :-)That is why they can live happily together because they know unity is more important than griping over diverity :-).
Have a great weekend!
Cheers
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stephen This is all very cryptic and well written.
But you know that we know what this story is all about so we know you don't have to know what we know about details.
Then again since we know what you know what its all about, then ,I know you know,I don't have to flesh it out.
That should confuse the morons and not Dr Bala's monkeys as they know what we know what its all about.
Then again.....
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Unknown Dear Stephen,
Thanks! Love your cryptic response that shows that you know more than what you show you know :-).
Only problem is - they are probably confused while trying to figure out who is who while Dr. Bala's monyets are happily playing real games in the forest where they live...
And so the comedy oops I mean tragedy or rather tragic comedy continues...
Take care and have a great week ahead!
Shalom
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Anonymous sorry, i mean 'better than food in
limestone city ie. ipoh', cheers.
still awake at 3.19am !!?
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Unknown Oic...Ya..Take care and have a great day drinking white coffee!
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Unknown Haha! You are so right in that I am totally pi**ed!!! The situation has crossed the borders of sanity. Take care and have a great day!
Hugs
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nick Sis,
Prepare to be astonished with more madness. A royal commission to study the feasibility of an opposition state government? "Feasibility"??? As far as I know, that state government already exist and there's no need to do a feasibility study on something that already exist!
And to top it off it (the suggestion)came from a minister whose ministry lost RM 100 Million worth of jet engines from a maximum "security deficit" storage area. No royal commission established there! Where did he get his Phd? The Bovine University in Springfield? Maybe he's a good friend of Homer (not the author of Iliad and Odyssey) too.
Hamba.
A simple case of mad cow disease (He must have got it while studying in university).
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Unknown Dear Nick
It's my turn now to feel .....
I do not know how to feel anymore. Will be in touch with you soon.
Thanks for being a very dear friend and a supportive blog reader.
Ada tangisan mata lah when I write this.
Take care...
Salam
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A Arthur They are most probably paid agents provocateur from AMNO, as till today they cannot accept the fact the DAP is running the show with PAS and PKR. Perhaps throw in a couple of Indons as they know too well the men in blue would not stop them to check their IDs.
They are poor losers. What they have in mind is to rule forever and rape the land and its produce and never for one moment think of the prosperity of the nation as a whole.
This is the legacy of TDM, walk-over by sleepy Badawi and will be perpetuated by our incompetent PM as there is just no way for him to rid himself of the little Napoleans and War Lords who have been living on the fat of the land for too long and suddenly all their perks disappeared, all their power to influence the award of contracts and land schemes lost, except the take home tax-free meagre salary of an ADUN for those elected opposition.
Hello where is the former CM? Can he say a word about this hooliganism behavior. As usual he did not know what is going on or do not want to know what is going on when these protests are made by bumiputras, except to prepare his academic KPI for his boss.
Penang is such an excellent tourist destinations and I do hope that BN should not thwart the plans of LGE to develop Penang just because he is running the government and BN is the opposition and has no more bite.
To all those who support BN, please love your State and love your nation and do not be swayed by hotheaded and selfish politicians who have their own agenda in destroying the State so that they can be voted in the next election.
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Unknown Dear Arthur
Thanks for your very strongly worded response even though you do not hail from the island of madness.
What you have said is so true and I hope those who are silent will put their foot down instead of taking an ambivalent approach. Those who are empty vessels making a lot of noise should just zip up and look at themselves.
As for the rest of us, we had better watch and pray as more tragic comedies could unfold before our eyes!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Arthur. Take care and have a blessed week.
Cheers
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Anonymous In Pulau Gila, these are the cries of the desperately deranged who would like to topple the government and set up a pornocracy (government run by prostitutes or harlots) in its place.
We do indeed live in interesting times. There is method in their madness.
:-)
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Unknown Dear Anonymous
Wow!!! You ARE a good writer with much wit and humor in your style. I am honored to have a master grace my blog.
Absolutely love your comment! Thanks for sharing.
Do keep in touch and have a good day!
Cheers
Anonymous haha, i know the pulau gila where food tastes better than limestone ct.
(iwc)